Fifty Shades of London

That's some shady shade! London is a city that is unapologetic, she doesn't want your feeble words! From north to south and in between this Roman city of the future is a supermodel of the world! London will take those queens down, she's got fifty shades to throw at you! Let those Pearly Kings and Queens forever serve their London hot couture! Elizabeth II, we need a word! Now work! 

Hey Queen! Come on Lizzie, lets spill the tea?! Buckingham Palace is the place to have a good old fashion kiki! Yes, I'm British but when I checked out Buckingham Palace I was just like 'get out of my way!' London is a quick paced city that welcomes you with a short smile, its the London way or the high way! I let my patriotic side have its moment, I was royally impressed at the show piece of the British Royal Family. Westminster wins! We embrace the international vibe in London for people from the four corners of the globe try and catch a glimpse of Queenie and her clan but we had plans! Liz you better work! Spilling the tea I think the Queen E was home at Buckingham Palace that day, something to do with the flag I think? The American's put their hands up to the Royal hysteria, those folks just love our Royal Family! They weren't throwing any shade! I have my views about the Royal Family but after Prince George was born in 2013 England has seen a boom in UK inbound tourism, should we say thank you to Baby G?! Yes B!

I can't say what it is that makes me love London? Maybe because I was born there? West Midlands heart, London by that Great British burgundy book! Get hooked on London's intoxicating vibe, let's stay with Westminster because Cupid boy you'll see the good stuff! Forget Soho, you know its all about executive realness if you know what I mean?! Throwing some serious shade on the scene is the political side of things for the decisions are made in the Houses of Parliament. The Elizabeth Tower stands like a Glamazon, maybe she was based on female phenomenon? Let's keep that political shade for next time, don't blame me for bringing that issue up would just get ugly. How many shades of London have I thrown so far? London's political avenue makes its voice heard, those protesters fight for their respected cause! Bring it for the children! Thinking that I was going to cancel on this straight talking blog makes my blood boil, let's got forth to throw some more shade! Have you been to Regent's Park? If you haven't, you better go girl! 

TINA! Let's Azonto down to the West African vibe, a controversial choice but I was brave enough to try some Jollof Rice and Beef! This part of London brought realness, not that many tourists know this part of the game so make that your challenge to make a change? Consider that done! Take the Docklands Light Railway to Woolwich Arsenal to experience London's take on Little Accra and Little Lagos, I told you London's got many sides to her complex character. I chose Tasty to try order that Jollof Rice, its a taste I won't forget so that's another reason to try something new! The young British African ladies served Beyonce realness with their weaves and hairpieces, serving competition for real in London's SE18! A girl has to travel in London, its a sure thing that Crossrail is coming to Woolwich's Arsenal. Do I hear the yuppies calling? Intertwined with the West African vibe I noticed that Woolwich's waterfront and barracks have been crafted into London's newest executive address for those office types. Azonto BB!

Serve your weave African lady! Woolwich brings the Firepower with a sickening new museum that educates the willing about the wars and artillery of now and yesterday's battles. Woolwich has a extensive history with its story dating back to the days of the Royal Arsenal. Eat some Jolllof Rice and Beef, educate yourself about the Arsenal then you'll be a champion! I told you that I was bringing back some shade! Let's empower Woolwich because destiny could well be yours SE18! I have friends from this part of London, they are genuine and down to earth, that's all that matters! London is a bit like me, we're both unapologetic so recognise! Embrace the African vibe, I used to live in Newark, New Jersey where her Downtown served West African 1920's realness! Just because a place has a cultural influence and a kick ass wartime story positive shade shall be thrown! Just spill the Tea! Turn out the lights, wake up our souls London you'll never be alone! Yes, Woolwich its been emotional, let's turn it up somewhere else in London. 

River Thames! People have been talking since the beginning of time, but you're standing that test because you serve London with its bridges and its where North meets West! Captured to the left is Tower Bridge, one of London's most iconic bridges to stretch the Thames gap. On the southern side there's Shad Thames in the London Borough of Southwark, that part of town turns it back to Dickensian London with its former warehouses and brew-houses. Why not try a pure brew pint at the Anchor Tap on Horselydown Lane? London wants you now, but she doesn't appreciate slackers! Crossing the bridges of London needs to be done with focus, stick to the path and you'll be fine! That Tower Bridge reigned as top dog during London's shipping era but there's always a new girl to throw the shade on the competition! Rising from nothing The Shard is the skyscraper of the moment, some would say that she's the future?! Build her a boyfriend I say! London is heading for the Hong Kong treatment! Reinvent yourself London! 

Okay, I'm going to break it down because I call the shots here! Upon my last visit to London I didn't go to Camden Town, I had seen her on my previous trip so I chose something new. Shoreditch, Spitalfields and Brick Lane was the answer to that question, searching for Huguenot realness I found that and the work place of Jack the Ripper! I got my drink on with some crazy fools at the Ten Bells Tavern on the corner of Fournier Street, then I stumbled down to Brick Lane for a curry! I'll always be shameless! That Jack slayed! You wanted to say that I know you did! I said Shabat Shalom to Golders Green and Stamford Hill! I wanted some Kosher Chicken Soup and a Cream Cheese Bagel or two, I tell you London I wasn't disappointed! The London Underground is the toughest mother out of the lot, the commuters of London have a code so don't break that sacred thing! London definitely has fifty shades of realness and sass, just respect and don't forget China Town because she's a whole other story! London you know that I do love you! 

Queen Elizabeth! Lady I Still Want That Kiki! 

Joseph Harrison