Well, it’s that time again. The 2011 Costume Institute Gala, also known as the Met Ball, was last night. Celebrities put on (or in at least one case, were sewn into) their dresses. The evening was dedicated to Alexander McQueen, a designer who created some of the most interesting and dramatic designs we’ve seen. You’d think the celebrities would have dressed to honor this ideal. Not to mention, it’s a friggin’ ball. I found, however, most celebs played it safe and as result, left me bored to tears. There were a few who went for the drama and succeeded while others went for the drama and fell so flat they wouldn’t even qualify as a speed bump on the fashion highway. Yeah, I know there aren’t speed bumps on the highway- you try making that metaphor work!
So here we go… Fuck, Marry, or Kill: 2011 Met Ball Edition
Fuck
She took a chance, and while it’s a little off the wall, but it’s a million times better than the sea of gold, beige, and boring dresses seen last night.
You look pretty. Not wifey material, just pretty.
Marry
I know, I know. She’s totally overhyped, a little full of herself, and we’re tired of seeing her. But damn does she look good. I think this is my favorite outfit of the night.
I am totally on Team Dakota. This is exactly what I would have worn if I was her age and going to a ball. Except I also would have covered myself in glitter. Because glitter rocks.
Doutzen Kroes
Another gorgeous red dress. Very simple, but dramatic!
Love it. Just. Plain. Love. It. This is a bird-inspired dress that’s not a trainwreck.
Meow. While this isn’t the typical “gala” outfit, it’s gorgeous and interesting enough to work.
Kill
I get what you’re going for here- You’re an angel that has escaped the clutches of mad, deranged fashion editors who want you to get out bed for less than $10,000. No? Existential Mummy? Umm… I’m out of explanations.
This looks like something Helena Bonham Carter would wear. Yeah, I went there.
Dear Diary, I finally got to attend my prom! Okay, so it’s not really my prom. They’re honoring some weird dead guy. But I’m pregnant and radiant and this dress totally covers my belly. And don’t tell Goldie, but I snuck a flask in under my dress. White wine spritzers are so yum!
At least her boobs distract from the awful bottom of the dress? Seriously though, I bet $20 she cannot breathe in that dress. No one can see your size tag, B. go ahead and grab that next size up.
I blame the dress, I think. If she can’t make this look good, then maybe no one could. No, you know what? It was a bad choice! Blake, we get it. You’re hot. Super hot. Stop doing anything and everything possible to get us to imagine you naked.
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