Dating Magazine

Divorcing? Consider Taking a Time out

By Datecoachtoni @CoachToni

According to a consensus of divorce studies done over the past decade- approximately 50 to 66 percent happen between couples who reported having average happiness and low conflict in their relationships. Common myth has led us to believe that divorce results from abuse, high conflict and other extreme conditions that make it impossible for a couple to work through their problems and heal the marriage. According to the research, the real truth is that divorce happens most often between average couples who have stopped putting the effort into their relationship, joint parenting and the overall good of the family. They have drifted apart and no longer function as a team.

What this clearly implies is that many divorces could be saved. The question is- how can this be done? In their book, Second Chances, Leah Ward Sears and William J. Doherty outline a modest reform that U.S. state legislatures could enact. This reform would require longer waiting periods for divorce and parenting education courses that could be completed online and that would also include information and resources to assist in reconciliation. Information on how to use a non-adversarial approach to divorce would also be available to those who truly believe divorce is the right choice for them.

Considering the huge financial and emotional fallout, especially for children, that often results from divorce- these suggestions make a lot of sense and will hopefully be seen that way by those who write the law.

How many of us wish that we could get a second chance to do something better, choose a different option, or not take that step we have lived to regret? Certainly this is true of many now divorced adults.

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