I take some ownership for the absolute destruction in this review. I remember when Die Hart was a thing, and I thought it was a show on Quibby, which I did not subscribe to, and it died really fast. My recollection was that Roku bought the library of Quibby content, including Die Hart. So I don’t know how it got to Amazon, and I’m not sure why it is a full length movie.
But, it had audio description. This was also trending on Amazon, and I had the time and the curiosity to find out exactly what the hell was going on here.
This is one of the least funny things I’ve seen in quite some time, for something that is trying to be funny. Kevin Hart has some really funny roles and some solid films on his resume. He’s even shown his ability to handle dramatic work. I cannot imagine what possessed him or anyone to make this. I cringed the whole movie. I felt bad for everyone who got dragged into this, especially the exceptional Paula Pell who needs better roles. Hasn’t Girls 5 Eva bought her some street cred?
There’s nothing at the end, so I’m once again left wondering who this guy is. He also went uncredited on Immaculate, and it’s like he doesn’t want people to know, or no one wants to give specifically him the credit. To be fair, the film is dumb, the audio description is fine. And while I thought he was inappropriate for Immaculate, his voice lends perfectly for comedies, so he’s a great narrator choice here.
Sadly, I can’t recommend anyone ever listen to this. It’s some bizarre plot where Kevin Hart is an action star who is threatened by his co-star (Nathalie Emanuel) doing her own stunts, so he fires his stunt man, and does his own work. Then, he gets a mysterious death threat, wonders who is might be, and instead of just leaping to “probably the guy I just fired”, he then turns out to be a garbage version of himself that has pissed off so many people that he has to go on this weird apology tour of people he has wronged to figure out who wants him dead. When we finally get where we are obviously going, Kevin Hart does a terrible version of himself yet again as the stunt man. You will not care how this ends, but you will hope that the other actors and their careers don’t suffer.
This is awful. It’s easily one of the worst things I’ve seen this year, and before you think I’m being mean, or I don’t like Kevin Hart, I’m one of the few critics who actually gave Lift a pretty good score (a B-). So, when everyone else was dragging him earlier this year, I didn’t I didn’t mind Lift. This? I hope it dies… hard.
Final Grade: D- (with a vengeance)
