Business Magazine

Communication is Hearing What Isn’t Said

Posted on the 25 June 2014 by Combi31 @combi31
Communication is hearing what isn’t said

Peter Drucker once said that, "The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said."

Furthermore, one of the pre-suppositions of NLP states that 'you cannot, not communicate - everything you say and most of what you do will communicate something, so the idea of radio silence, can have the effect of turning the sound right up.

People often, mistakingly, imagine, that by doing nothing, they can avoid personal responsibility in communication, but, I am sorry to say, this just isn't true, non-action is not an option, as it will be interpreted in some way by the listener(s).

We communicate all the time, even when we are not speaking, whether we are aware of it or not - and by any number of methods and mechanisms, from our dress sense to what actually leaves our lips as the spoken word.

It is not just what we say, but how we say it, where we say it and what we do, which carries a whole lot more weight than the words alone.

There are the non-verba l cues, such as hand gestures, facial gestures, eye-contact, or lack of, and posture to name but a few.

Would you buy a car from someone who didn't look you in the eye? Nah, thought not.

Para-linguistic cues, such as inflection, accent, tone, intonation, rhythm, sounds and register.

These are the things that we can see and hear, but they don't stop there.

We communicate by both action and inaction - sometimes a more powerful message is conveyed by doing nothing, than when we are actually doing something.

But hey! The person has done nothing - oh, yeah! BUT, they have, in some way, communicated some pretty strong messages - You cannot, not communicate.

In language, it is quite striking how pauses (intentional and well-placed, pauses) can speak so much louder than the words around them, good communicators use this effectively when speaking in public.

Posture is another strong way of getting a message across - people often like to play around as 'the-part-time-psycholgist' interpreting body language of others and extracting, sometimes, dubious conclusions - folded arms, does not necessarily mean defensiveness nor a desire not to open up. It could well be just comfortable, however, a slouching speaker can be looked at in a very different light.

However, put these, non-verbal cues together with verbal or paralinguistic clues, and you may be on to something.

Communication is all about responsibility, and taking responsibility for the message creating the intended response with the listener - if communicators are not willing to take responsibility for this, then their communication 'results' will suffer - if what they say is not clearly understood, then whose fault is this then?

Communication is a game of perceptions often devoid of reality - the importance is what is perceived by the listeners - not what is said, but what is understood and remembered. It is not a binary process - there are lots of variables that need to be taken into account, by the communicator - it is not my audience / listener's fault if they get the wrong end of the stick - the responsibility stays firmly with me!

And, whatever I do, I will be communicating in a constant stream - I cannot, not communicate!

So just remember, when you are trying to persuade people of your super-mega ideas to change their lives, don't slouch, avoid eye-contact nor speak with a driveling, monotonous voice - you are in fact going to convince them of something - but it won't be to 'buy' your ideas, you nor your 'product'.

If your intention does not match the response that is created in your listeners, things will happen - and when they fall stony-silent when you ask them if they have any questions, they are communicating a very strong message to you - most of it can be resumed by a resounding "Nah, not interested, sorry ... Next!"

Communication and trust are the two principle ingredients for successful relationships, however, "The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place." George Bernard Shaw

© 2014, admin. All rights reserved.

Communication is hearing what isn’t said

You Might Also Like :

Back to Featured Articles on Logo Paperblog

These articles might interest you :

  • Express Your Ex With Gemstone Diamond Engagement Rings

    Express Your With Gemstone Diamond Engagement Rings

    Morganite engagement rings have grown to be symbolic of real love and commitment to that modern couples. A diamond ring you proudly you should get some... Read more

    8 hours, 22 minutes ago by   Jayshreebhagat
  • To Die For Blondies


    What is a Blondie? It is the dense, more caramel like version of a brownie, but every bit as dense and fudgy in texture. They are incredibly sweet and incredibl... Read more

    8 hours, 58 minutes ago by   Mariealicerayner
  • Go Organic with Kin-Kin Natural – Eco Friendly Natural Dishwashing Liquid

    Organic with Kin-Kin Natural Friendly Dishwashing Liquid

    If you are contemplating changes to your home and life in an effort to be more responsible to the environment you need to start using natural and organic... Read more

    9 hours, 29 minutes ago by   Kravelv
  • Like Nowhere Else: the Allure of Panama’s Guna Yala

    Like Nowhere Else: Allure Panama’s Guna Yala

    Headwinds. Choppy seas. Eyeball navigation through reefs where the usual tropical cues are absent. Days of gray skies. Taciturn communities. Few supplies. Read more

    The 22 March 2018 by   Behan Gifford
  • BNV004: 10 Tips for Becoming a Brand New Vegan

    BNV004: Tips Becoming Brand Vegan

    In episode 4 of the Brand New Vegan podcast, I give you my top 10 Tips for Becoming a Brand New Vegan.  Photo by Hans Splinter | cc Flickr Be sure and stop by... Read more

    The 22 March 2018 by   Chuck Underwood
  • Concert Review: Evil Never Dies

    Concert Review: Evil Never Dies

    Judas Priest, Saxon, Black Star Riders rock Newark. by Paul J. Pelkonen The mighty Judas Priest (l.r. Richie Faulkner, Scott Travis, Rob Halford, Andy Sneap, Ia... Read more

    The 22 March 2018 by   Superconductor
  • Designer Daddy’s Ultimate Road Trip Playlist

    Designer Daddy’s Ultimate Road Trip Playlist

    Road trips were a big part of my childhood. As a military family, that meant lots visits to grandparents and cousins each summer and Christmas. Most of these... Read more

    The 22 March 2018 by   Designerdaddy