Drink Magazine

Brew News Flash: The Philly Beer Week Hammer of Glory Has Been Stolen!

By Boozedancing @boozedancing
Brew News Flash: The Philly Beer Week Hammer of Glory Has Been Stolen!

The Hammer of Glory shown here with Ben Franklin.

One hour ago, we received a ransom note from someone who claims to have stolen the Hammer of Glory. As you are well aware, today is the official start of Philly Beer Week 2012. At 7AM this morning, the Hammer of Glory is scheduled to make an appearance at the Independence Visitor Center so that it can begin its journey to tonight’s Opening Tap. Here are the details about this journey from the Philly Beer Week website:

Forged from the sweat and blood of 10,000 brewers, carried through the city by an army of heroic bartenders, greeted with the hopes and dreams of countless thirsty beer drinkers, we present the legendary HAMMER OF GLORY! Follow the HOG on its daylong tour throughout the city, commencing live  on FOX-29 and accompanied by the SugarHouse double-decker bus. Enjoy ample beer and big fun as the Hammer is carried to some of the city’s finest bars and restaurants, till it finally arrives at Independence Mall for the official tapping of Philly Beer Week’s Brotherly Suds by Mayor Nutter.

The local authorities have been notified, and the original ransom note is in their possession. They are actively pursuing all leads, and have asked that I use the power of the interwebz to bring this criminal to justice, so that the Hammer of Glory can be retrieved in time for this morning’s event. Below is a copy of the ransom note:

Brew News Flash: The Philly Beer Week Hammer of Glory Has Been Stolen!

Brew News Flash: The Philly Beer Week Hammer of Glory Has Been Stolen!

Brew News Flash: The Philly Beer Week Hammer of Glory Has Been Stolen!

The authorities are taking this threat very seriously, and thanks to a careless mistake by the alleged perpetrator of this dastardly deed, they are actively pursuing a very solid lead. Below is an image of their prime suspect which they have asked me to share with you:

Brew News Flash: The Philly Beer Week Hammer of Glory Has Been Stolen!

The Alemonger and the Hammer of Glory.
This photo was taken last June at PBW 2011.

If you have any information regarding the whereabouts of The Alemonger, or the Hammer of Glory, please contact the local authorities immediately.

This madman must be stopped. Philly Beer Week must go on. Mayor Nutter and the Philly Craft Beer loving community are counting on us!

Thank you in advance for all of your help. Godspeed!


Back to Featured Articles on Logo Paperblog