Dating Magazine

Ben, Lauren…and JoJo

By Datecoachtoni @CoachToni

Given the premise of the shows, The Bachelor and The Bachelorette—it’s amazing we think it is even possible for contestants to find love. After all, one Bachelor or Bachelorette choosing between 25 stunning members of the opposite sex? Yes, it isn’t as hard in the first few episodes, when it is easier to cull the group down by eliminating a couple of contestants who are obviously not a good fit. But after the group shrinks, dates become more intense and REAL, feelings start to grow, jealousies run rampant, and attachments form—how could it be possible to really explore a relationship with one when there are others you must attend to, all the while remaining a bit aloof?

Then what about those Bachelors or Bachelorettes who are supposed to make a final decision but haven’t made the right connection with anyone? Even worse, are the ones who have strong feelings for more than one person at the same time. This of course was the case with Ben Higgins.

Most viewers were asking themselves how it is possible to love two people at the same time. Apparently they have never had the experience. For those who believe it is possible, there was still a belief that one must stand out more than the other. It was Ben’s Mom who asked the right question—“Who is it that you cannot imagine having to say good-bye to?” When Ben thought about this, Lauren rose to the top.

Indeed Lauren might not have gotten the first impression rose—but it seems she did make a very strong, positive first impression that stayed with Ben the entire length of the season. There was chemistry—physical, friendship and intellectual. They could talk easily, laughed at the same things, had a feeling of comfort in each other’s presence—and he was very physically attracted to her. He expressed similar things about JoJo—especially the friend piece. That one came up a lot. But apparently Lauren won out in the other two, and as Ben put it so well, there just is no way to really describe it. He is right, there really is not.

He cared deeply for JoJo, could see himself with her—and told her as much. No wonder she was confused—his words were sincere, so she was sure she could not be missing something. But it was Lauren he just couldn’t say good-bye to, and that was what JoJo could not have known and what was so confusing to both of them.

As long as this franchise goes on, we will see scenarios like this one—maybe even more intense ones. After all, it is a show and this one got a lot of attention. Wonder how the Producers will try to beat it next time? JoJo will be the lucky (??) Bachelorette. She will get to walk in Ben’s shoes and has already said she will do it better. We will see JoJo. Ben thought the same thing.

The show’s track record has improved as has its ratings. So maybe they are doing something different or better now. Good luck JoJo. After all the helicopter rides, glasses of bubbly, elegant meals, glorious settings—it will come down to one guy, or maybe more?

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