I’ve been writing this blog in my head all week long. As soon as my soul told my mind I was losing another baby , I began writing this.
My heart wanted to keep her safe with me until earth side , but my body expelled her without my permission.
Sometimes we hate what our bodies do to our souls. Sometimes I’ve thought of my body as my enemy. If I am being very honest here, there are times where I’ve began to detach myself from my physical body. It doesn’t define me. Or my happiness.
I’ve hated it , and out of that bitterness is born.
My womb has now held six children. Three are here with me, three growing up in a perfect place. My heart in two places at once. My mind in two different directions, trying to find my place on the ground. All the while my head is in the clouds.
I am not writing this for your sympathy . I am not writing this for you to feel sorry for me, or to even tell me you’re sorry. I am writing this for your friends that will / have gone through the agony of losing a baby. Early , late , born… The pain is different but In reality it’s still a child lost. It’s still unbearable.
What does your friend need from you during this time?
She needs your prayers. Prayers for strength, and time to grieve.
JESUS has commanded us to be his hands and his feet on this earth. What does that mean for a friend , family or church member that has suffered a loss of any kind?
The last thing a grieving mother is thinking about is eating. Drinking.
Bring a a meal. It’s a burden lifted, especially when there are other children to feed. A husband that’s working non stop. Feed them.
She needs you to just listen. She doesn’t need you to try to figure out why she lost the baby, that doesn’t matter now. She’s hurting. Love on her. Her brain is done for a few days. Be easy on her.
Offer to come watch her children while she simply naps. She will bury her head in her pillow , probably sob for a few minutes and drift off to sleep. The nights are hard for her. When all is quiet, her house seems as empty as her heart.
I know these things aren’t always possible when you have small children, but it’s my hearts desire to see women that are grieving to be well taken care of. For them to feel validated in their loss, and in their tears.
It’s Easter weekend, and I’ve thought many times about how Mary must have felt watching her son die a slow, painful death. Her agony of losing him is unimaginable.
He is the son of the one true God, but a son to her still. A child lost.
I’ve never compared my life to Mary’s , but this weekend I am feeling her grief. Her sorrow and a touch of her pain.
But her pain didn’t last. Her pain was redeemed. Her pain danced upon injustice. He rose again.
Just as my babies have.
No more pain, no more suffering they’re enduring. They are whole. Just as Christ was that Sunday morning.
So, if you know someone who is suffering a loss, take my advice please. Be His hands to feed them and His feet to serve them.
