Dear Diary: I have been in a state of shock since yesterday when I raided my stash in a concealed compartment in the Resolute Desk, grabbed a Frisbee and took Bo and Sunny out for some "exercise" while I inhaled some lungsful of Maui Wowie. I have written in these pages before about my phobia for killer WW2 vets. But yesterday I faced something even more terrifying than the jeers of blood-thirsty old men. There I was with the two dogs, my joint and the Frisbee, when someone in a sinister black coupe rammed the barrier outside the White House gates. A rebellion, I thought. And so quick ...I guess we did make Obamacare too expensive. I dove onto the grass screaming: " Kool-Aid!" which is the code word the Secret Service uses for Me. Or is it Renege-aid? Either way an agent from my detail sprinted towards my prone body and flung himself on top of me. "The suspect vehicle is now heading toward the Capitol," he said, gasping for air, then he rolled me over, and ran his eyes over me. "You look unharmed, sir," he said, "apart from that brown stain on your tie." In my haste to dive for cover, I had landed on fresh evidence of Bo's efficiently functioning intestine. But enough about me.
Debate Magazine
Dear Diary: I have been in a state of shock since yesterday when I raided my stash in a concealed compartment in the Resolute Desk, grabbed a Frisbee and took Bo and Sunny out for some "exercise" while I inhaled some lungsful of Maui Wowie. I have written in these pages before about my phobia for killer WW2 vets. But yesterday I faced something even more terrifying than the jeers of blood-thirsty old men. There I was with the two dogs, my joint and the Frisbee, when someone in a sinister black coupe rammed the barrier outside the White House gates. A rebellion, I thought. And so quick ...I guess we did make Obamacare too expensive. I dove onto the grass screaming: " Kool-Aid!" which is the code word the Secret Service uses for Me. Or is it Renege-aid? Either way an agent from my detail sprinted towards my prone body and flung himself on top of me. "The suspect vehicle is now heading toward the Capitol," he said, gasping for air, then he rolled me over, and ran his eyes over me. "You look unharmed, sir," he said, "apart from that brown stain on your tie." In my haste to dive for cover, I had landed on fresh evidence of Bo's efficiently functioning intestine. But enough about me.
