Debate Magazine
Dear Diary: I have had to deal with an emergency today. After my discovery that Froot Loops all taste the same I resolved immediately to find a non-Kellogs cereal worthy of daily consumption by the man with world's finest brain. I instructed chef and golf buddy Sam Kass to come up with a cereal that would satisfy my demanding, sophisticated palate. He quickly found a worthy candidate: Count Chocula, a chocolate-flavored cereal made by General Mills. Bwahahahahaaa! Just the thing to fortify my resolve before Vladimir Putin calls during my breakfast time, as he invariably does.
