Melissa asked a brilliant question:
“How do I go about balancing my natural flamboyance with the practicalities of being a mom of four?”
First of all, there is absolutely no reason why you cannot have your natural flamboyance in your style.
Being a mom of four does not mean your personality has to disappear. It simply means your clothes need to work harder for you. You don’t have to be a mum, but still have a lifestyle that demands a more practical wardrobe.
This is not about toning yourself down. It is about being strategic.
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Start with the Practical Elements
If you are a mom of one or four, practicality matters. That is not negotiable.
So before buying any clothes, ask yourself:
- Is this machine washable?
- Do I need to spend hours ironing it?
- Is it wash and wear?
- Can I quickly run a steamer over it?
- Does it require constant dry cleaning?
If everything in your wardrobe needs specialist care, it is probably not practical for your lifestyle.
But if it’s machine-washable and easy to maintain, why not wear it?
Forgo the black and neutral when choosing practical items like your puffer jacket. Instead, select a signature color that stands out and brightens your winter days.
Practical does not have to mean plain. It simply means the garment fits your real life.
And that is where intelligent style begins.
Flamboyance Does Not Mean Impractical
We often confuse flamboyance with fussiness.
They are not the same thing.
Flamboyance can be expressed through:
- Pattern
- Colour
- Interesting construction
- Detail
- Texture
- Unexpected combinations
Here’s an example of a very practical outfit that has a few elements that make it more interesting – the textuerd fabric of teh knit top, the sashiko stitching on the jeans and the large brooches that are durable but make a statement.
For example, a pattern is a brilliant tool. It creates visual interest and, very practically, it can disguise the occasional mark from little banana hands.
Instead of a plain denim jacket find one with a pattern – still comfortable, very practical but way more flamboyant.
Pattern allows you to express personality without adding more layers or complexity. A patterned t-shirt is still a t-shirt. It is just more you.
Make the Basics Interesting
Sometimes the solution is not more clothing. It is more thoughtful clothing.
It might be:
- A patterned t-shirt instead of a plain one
- Sneakers that are comfortable but visually interesting
- An embellished denim jacket
- A dress in a bold print that is still jersey and machine washable
There are so many interesting shoes out there if you actually go looking. Comfortable does not have to mean boring.
Here’s a super comfortable and practical outfit, and flamboyant is it’s middle name! The print is bold and fun, and the denim jacket is embellished (by me) to express personality.
This is where you stop settling.
Instead of grabbing the plain and predictable version, you choose the version that reflects who you are.
Define What Flamboyance Means to You
I do not know what your version of flamboyance is, and that matters.
- For one woman, it is dramatic sleeves.
- For another, it is a bold color.
- For someone else, it is statement earrings or unexpected prints.
Now, big dangly sleeves might not be practical when you are juggling four children, or doing other things that they might get snagged in. That is just reality.
But that does not mean there are no other design elements available to you.
You can look for:
- Interesting necklines
- Unusual seam details
- Bold patterns
- Textured fabrics
- Mixing colours
- Statement footwear
- Structured silhouettes
There is always a way to incorporate personality without compromising function.
Jeans and sneakers are comfortable and practical, but adding a bold coloured shirt and jacket (this jacket has stretch and is super warm and comfy) takes it away from bland and boring.
Style Is About Alignment, Not Sacrifice
This is where we come back to something important.
Style is not about following rules. It is about making choices aligned with your values and your life.
If you value self-expression, that deserves space in your wardrobe.
If you value practicality, that also deserves space.
This is not an either-or.
It is about intelligent integration.
Try mixing prints – like this scarf and cardigan – all practical but adding a level of interest and flamboyance.
You Do Not Have to Become Boring
Just because you are a mom or grandmother does not mean your style has to go down the tubes.
You do not have to fade into the background.
You do not have to default to dull.
You do not have to shrink yourself.
You can be practical.
You can be comfortable.
You can be washable.
And you can still be flamboyant.
The key is not abandoning who you are.
It is refining how you express it in a way that works beautifully with the life you are living right now.
And that is grown-up style.
Not Sure What Your Style is?
Sometimes we can get lost in the practical and lose what our personal style really is. We no longer really know what we aesthetically enjoy, particularly when we’ve been dressing a body that has changed shape and size. Rediscover your style with my Visualise Your Style mini-course – in just a few hours, you’ll have rediscovered what it is you visually love so that you can start curating a wardrobe of clothes that express your personal version of flamboyance (or whatever it is that you discover is what you love).
