Dating Magazine

Andi Loves Josh and Vice Versa

By Datecoachtoni @CoachToni

If you are a regular or even an occasional watcher of the Bachelor/Bachelorette series—you are probable fairly savvy about how things usually go during the show and how few truly happy endings there are not too long after the cameras stop rolling and the couples return to reality.

Let’s face it—the dates are over-the-top, a lot of the action is staged and edited—and it can’t be easy to get to know someone over an eight week period when you start with 25 eligible members of the opposite sex who are all competing for your limited time and attention.

However, as anyone who has ever been in love knows- you kind of know very quickly. Someone stands out—for many reasons, some you can’t even pinpoint. There is something about them—and over the course of a normal courtship (which this show is not)–the reasons become clearer as you sort out your attraction and begin using your head along with your gut and libido to decide if this is Mr./Ms. Right or Wrong.

This past season was a tough call. Andi is not only a beautiful young woman—she is also smart, independent and on top of her game. She is a total package and it was clear several of the guys fell hard. Would they have fallen that hard in real life without the hype and competition—hard to say? At the end, it was Nick and Josh—two very different guys, but both appeared to have real chemistry with Andi and it was difficult to know who she might be leaning towards and if this segment would end in a mistrial because Andi would not be able to choose. Well, it appears that she did struggle right up to the last night—but when she woke up that last morning, she was clear.

It’s easy to think it was the editing or that something happened that we just didn’t know about—but I believe that all along Andi was weighing her connection with each and thinking about which one would be the best overall fit for her. Nick and Andi had a clear intellectual connection. Andi talked about this a lot—he could read her and that was both exciting and challenging. She referred to him as highly intelligent, which helps to confirm that their intellectual chemistry was strong. The physical was there as well, but perhaps less strong than with Josh. The piece that seemed to be the problem was their friendship chemistry. Yes, they related well and had fun together—but on that last good-bye morning, Andi talked about how serious their relationship was at times. She feared they would always be discussing some issue instead of just having light, fun, silly time together. Nick was bright, cute, and sexy—but she couldn’t just be and have crazy fun with him like she does with Josh.

Andi was drawn to Josh’s looks immediately. He is her “type,” a strong, sexy, handsome athletic guy. She feared he would be a player due to her history with this type- but it turns out he is a “really nice guy,” even according to his rival, Nick. In addition, they come from and presently live in the same hometown, Andi is Jewish and Josh’s Mom is also Jewish- less worry about blending backgrounds. Josh is no longer a professional athlete and has instead gone into business and is apparently bright and capable—all of which means that Andi and Josh definitely have strong physical and intellectual chemistry, and come from a similar culture. However, where Josh has the real advantage over Nick is in the friendship he shares with Andi. In almost every shot together they are laughing, they appear very relaxed and their ease of conversation is evident. Andi chose Josh over Nick because of their friendship chemistry- an important element over a future lifetime of challenges together.
What struck me was the final scene when Andi and Josh came together and she told him he is the one. With past “final rose” scenes, it often felt as though the couple had chosen by going, eeny, meny, miney, mo, were caught up in playing out the romantic scene—or were just doing what was expected on the show, choosing someone from a large group of possibilities. It usually doesn’t feel real—and theses two did. Both said I love you over and over, their faces were radiant—and it was clear they were happy to be leaving the stage and returning home to real life and one another. They live about 5 minutes from one another—and have been seeing each other on the sly since the show wrapped. I’d make a solid bet on these two staying together and making it work.

And even if Andi had any lingering doubts about her decision (which it did not appear that she did)—after Nick’s comment on live, national TV asking her why she “made love to me,” if she wasn’t sure, any doubts she might have had would have disappeared. Nice guys don’t kiss and tell Nick.


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