When things get, uh… out of sorts, in your life, it may seem impossible to get back to normal. My “out of sorts” began in March, as you all probably remember from my previous blogs. I had to come to terms with the fact that this chapter in my life may not be so normal after all.
At first, that was really hard for me to grasp. But after some time went by, I realized that adversity will change you. I’ve said it before and I will say it until I draw my last breath: the only constant is change. Once you nail that concept into your brain, change will no longer frighten you. Intimidate you, maybe. But completely frighten you to the point where you are unable to face it… nah. You got this!
The adversity I faced so far this year changed my appearance, confidence, emotional stability, and even my relationships with people. Each of those changes were out of my control. Despite the number of changes I was unable to control, I found strength in controlling all things I could change.
For example, I have new scars on my body. Well, since I can’t change those, I sure as heck could change my hairstyle. So I did. Emotionally, I struggled being in certain areas of town that reminded me of the past, so I moved. In terms of relationships, I found that some people were not adding anything but negativity to my life, so I cut them out. I was unhappy, unfulfilled, and unable to continue working at my old job, so I resigned.
Listen, I am not saying quit your job, dye your hair blue, and ignore all your friends. Each of my changes were quite drastic if you think about it. In a span of a month-two months, I resigned my job, cut my hair, moved to a new city, and deleted not so great friends out of my life. Talk about change.
As wild as all of that sounds, it was something I really needed to do for myself. After the incident in March, I felt I had ZERO control over what happened to me in life. It was as if someone took over my book and began writing the next chapter for me. It was (and still is) awful. I wanted to take the pen back and end that chapter to start a new one. Since I can’t do that completely, and the chapter that began in March is still in progress, the pen is at least back in MY hands, now.
My chapter continues… with the point of view being told from my perspective and with my control. I am fully aware that curveballs will be thrown and my chapter may get “out of sorts” again, but this time I will be able to handle it a lot better. This time, I will hold on to the pen A LOT tighter before giving up. This time, adversity will have to work harder to take complete control over me for the second time.
Advice? While writing a chapter in your life, accept adversity for what it is… a challenge. Allow yourself to be challenged by adversity, not defeated by it. Hold tightly to your pen and if you have to let go, keep it close by. You will always be able to pick it back up to begin writing once again.