The Aftermath

I I'm trying to move on after the whole date debacle And also my 'friend'I'm wondering what is wrong with meWhy people think it's ok to treat me this wayI can't decide what to do about my friendShe texted this morningAsking me to call in to her I haven't replied yet It's like sometimes she the nicest person And then other times she is just down right rudeI know she wants to be friends with meBut as we've got closerI see another side to herOne that I don't like
My food has suffered through all of thisI've been so anxious and on edge the last couple of weeksThat eating properly has been last on my list When I'm anxiousI literally can't eatIt's been noticed by family members My weight tooI don't know if I've lost As I have no battery for my scaleAnd keep forgetting to get oneBut my clothes feel a little looserGod forgive me for enjoying that
This would be the perfect excuse to jump head first back in to my ED or addictionTo hit that big self destruct button that has been gathering dust the last few monthsI'm not going to lie to youI over used my meds todayJust to check off the planet for a whileTo escape the noise in my head And for the sweet release of sleep 
Tomorrow I will get back on trackTomorrow I will go to a meetingTomorrow I will take my meds correctly Tomorrow I will meet my friend from treatmentTomorrow I will start eating properly Tomorrow I will start as I mean to go onToday I just need a day off To escape To lick my wounds And wait for time to healI'm not okBut I will beTomorrow...