Survivors=Hope to Newly Diagnosed Patients

Most mornings, these days, find me in the radiation oncology waiting area of a large cancer center. While I wait for a loved one to get daily radiation treatment, I can’t help but notice the others waiting to go in for treatment.  Some seem cool and calm; others are visibly upset. Some look like they could use a large portion of hope.

Some days a person will strike up a conversation with me. Yesterday morning was one of those times. The young woman sitting next to me asks me how I feel. I explain that I am not the patient. I know she needs to talk, so I asks her how she is tolerating treatment. She says she is not sure if I can understand how she feels, since I am not the patient.

I share that I had radiation 13 years ago for breast cancer. “Me too,”she says and then she burst into tears saying, “You’re a survivor! Do you know what it means to meet a survivor when you’re going through treatment? I am in my 30′s. I have young children at home. I am so afraid I won’t live to see them raised. You’re my hope! You’re here 13 years later!

With that, her name is called for treatment. She tries to wipe the tears away that keep rolling down her checks as she walks  into the treatment area.

A few minutes later, a middle-aged woman, with her hair wrapped in a turban, comes over and sits down next to me. “I couldn’t help overhearing your conversation,” she says. “May I ask you something?” Before I can answer, she shares, “Today is my last day of treatment. I started treatment eight months ago-first surgery, then chemo, then radiation. I know I should be thrilled that this nightmare is over, but I’m not. My tumor was estrogen negative, so I am not a candidate for hormone therapy to prevent a recurrence.”

She pauses and then asks her question, “How do you live with the fear? Are you still afraid?”

We speak for a few minutes; it was all the she could handle. She needed to get away; she needed to get out of that treatment atmosphere.

In the brief time we speak, I suggest taking a “Time Out” from all things cancer. I explain that getting a way for a few days will help to get things in perspective; it will break the routine of treatment and all that treatment carried with it. I also share that joining a support group is a good place to begin to get a handle on fears. Sharing with a others helps make fears manageable.

Before we say goodbye, I share that my fears only come to mind when it is time for a checkup and that, I think, is natural.

My time in the waiting area today reminds me, once again, to  never underestimate the gift that we, who are survivors, have to share…the gift of hope.