Diaries Magazine

Super Sexy Sunday…

By Redneckprincess @RdNeckPrincess

Super Sexy Sunday…

This week we are going to talk about what NOT to do…to be uber sexy…

Use self tanning lotion.

Unless…

  1.  There is absolutely NO other way you can get a healthy golden glow.
  2. You have really good light when you apply it.
  3. You do it evenly, you have to be careful not to put it on too thick in some places and not others.
  4. You wash your hands really well after you apply it, it is really unattractive when you have orange hands and orange skin.
  5. You buy a quality product. I guarantee this is one of those things you do not buy in the no name brand.
  6. You don’t go too dark too fast, take your time, build it up slowly, and don’t try too get the… I have been in Hawaii for three weeks look, EVER.
  7. You do NOT…try and get a golden glow before your first date, I can pretty much put money on the fact you will screw it up, and he will never call you EVER again…it’s just a hunch, but I think it’s a good one.
  8. You never apply it, while drinking or smoking a big fat doobie.
  9. You never let your best friend convince you the above is a good idea.
  10. The stuff your friend gave you to try for free, made her get pregnant, and that is why she is giving it to you. Otherwise, do not take any chances that the bitch is doing you any favors…and even then, do you really want to risk it?
  11. You have someone reliable that will do your back for you and not write bad words in orange on your shoulder.
  12. You make sure the above person doesn’t lie to you to make you feel better about yourself.
  13. The sun goes dead in the sky and you have no other choice.

Super Sexy Sunday…

I think that is it, I can’t think of any other good reason to do it. I am not even sure these are good enough. I have to admit I have a bottle of self tanner under my sink, but that is pretty much where it sits. I just don’t have the guts to even try it. I saw a lady today that prompted the advice, I don’t even think she was aware of how bad it was in the sunlight. I of course filtered, somehow, and didn’t say anything out loud.

Well until now, pretty sure she doesn’t read my blog…so all good :)

Have a tanless and happy Sunday my friends…

Super Sexy Sunday…


You Might Also Like :

Back to Featured Articles on Logo Paperblog

These articles might interest you :

  • Tresemme Botanique Detox and Restore Shampoo | Review

    Tresemme Botanique Detox Restore Shampoo Review

    Tresemme BotaniqueLuckily, I haven't faced many issues with hair and I didn't bother much for a good hair care routine. 😄 My hair care routine was only oiling... Read more

    8 hours, 25 minutes ago by   Niharika Verma
    HAIR & BEAUTY, LIFESTYLE
  • Refrain

    Refrain

    It's always nice to experience something out of the ordinary in St Helens, and on this occasion it was quite extraordinary as I took to the streets to view a... Read more

    9 hours, 1 minute ago by   Mike Lindley
    ENTERTAINMENT, MUSIC
  • Republique, the Pub & Terrace Lounge…!

    Republique, Terrace Lounge…!

    How many of you have that one favourite restaurant that you always visit because you know that nothing can go wrong with your food you are happy while... Read more

    10 hours, 9 minutes ago by   Anithanayak
    FOOD & DRINK, RECIPES
  • Ragin' Ripple Sale Happening Now! Plus Steak, Doublestone and the New Thin...

    Ragin' Ripple Sale Happening Now! Plus Steak, Doublestone Thin Lizzy Tribute with Mothership!

    Time for a huge, ragin' Ripple sale!Let's clear some space in the warehouse for some new, killer releases comin' down the line.While supplies last: $5 CD's and... Read more

    10 hours, 10 minutes ago by   Ripplemusic
    ENTERTAINMENT, MUSIC
  • Berghaus Dragon’s Back Race 2017 – Day Two Review

    Berghaus Dragon’s Back Race 2017 Review

    Berghaus Dragon's Back Race 2017 - Day Two Review Start - Hafod y Llan Campsite Finish- Vanner Farm Campsite Distance covered - 58km Height climbed - 3,600m... Read more

    11 hours ago by   Abichal
    OTHER SPORTS, OUTDOORS
  • And Now for Something Completely Different

    Something Completely Different

    A Black Vulture (and a road-kill groundhog.) As I was driving to the grocery store on Monday, I saw a flock of these birds, maybe twenty, at the roadside and wa... Read more

    11 hours, 40 minutes ago by   Vickilane
    CREATIVITY, PHOTOGRAPHY
  • Creamy Chive & Cheddar Dressing

    Creamy Chive Cheddar Dressing

    We have a bank holiday coming up next weekend and the good news is we are actually expecting some pretty decent weather with it! Salad weather! Yay! I love, LOV... Read more

    12 hours, 14 minutes ago by   Mariealicerayner
    FOOD & DRINK, RECIPES