Current Magazine

Russian Bank Has Lame Promotion Involving Lending Cats

By Nottheworstnews @NotTheWorstNews

CNN reports that as some Russians believe having a cat enter a new home is good luck, Russia’s largest bank, Sberbank, is offering the first 30 people who get a new mortgage a new cat.

Oh, by the way, you don’t get to keep the cat. They loan it to you for two hours, and then take it back.

3 Slogans We Propose For Russia’s Largest Bank

1. “Sberbank. We are the largest bank in the world’s largest country and only had 30 cats to loan. So please stop calling us to ask us to lend you a cat. We are out of cats, and quite frankly, you would not have qualified to borrow a cat, based on your credit history.”

2. “Sberbank. Some kid in America with a box full of free kittens is our primary competitor.”

3. “Sberbank if lending 60 hours of cat time is our advertised promotion, just imagine what bummers are buried in our fine print.”


Back to Featured Articles on Logo Paperblog