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If You Win Powerball, Here’s What It Will Cost To Hang Out With Your Favorite C-List Celebrities!

By Nottheworstnews @NotTheWorstNews

Business Insider reports that a company called Celebrity Talent International allows you to book your favorite celebs, from big names to a good chunk of ex-contestants of theCelebrity Apprentice to appear at your event for fees ranging from under $10,000 to over a million dollars.

Click on this link to see what some of your fave celebs’ asking prices are!

Creed asks $150,000-$250,000 per appearance, which initially appears to be a discount compared to Nickelback‘s $1,000,000 to $1,500,000. We can allow you to ponder whether this is really a discount. Ask yourself, with the way the stock market’s been going since the dot-com bubble, is one Nickelback worth six Creeds? (We value both bands’ music at zero, and therefore Nickelback is worth “undefined” Creeds.)

3 Additional Ways To Waste Money Booking Celebrities For Your Event

1. $100,000 for Shannen Doherty? Hey, if you’re going to waste your Powerball money, at least write her an ironic check for $90,210. Anyway, her rate seems negotiable, as since Business Insider published the original article saying her rate is $100,000 and calling her a “has-been,” it appears the site may have changed her fee to “please call for fee,” unless we’re looking at a different part of the site than Business Insider did.

2.$20,000-$30,000 for an Ed Sullivan look-a-like! Why would we pay that for someone who clearly could not make plausible jokes about iPads or microwave ovens or President Jimmy Carter? Especially, when we could get the real, much more topical 1980s comedic poetry of the real Andrew Dice Clay for that price?

3. $100,000-$150,000 for Alex Trebek. We expect to get points for asking: “What is too much money to spend for someone who should be paying you money to give answers in the form of a question, if you were smart enough to appear on Jeopardy instead of paying him to show up at your local pub’s trivia night?”

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