CNBC reports that Clorox, makers of products including bleach, has stated that the U.S. consumer is starting to turn around.
Hopefully, if it’s to buy bleach, it’s not to copy the criminals in Ben Affleck’s movie the Town, or the alleged “splash and dash” criminals in New York who copied the movie the Town, by splashing bleach on ATMs to hide their DNA evidence after robberies.
Although robbing ATMs is bad and not recommended, the good news is… hey, you may have used an ATM without germs all over it that may get you sick when you withdrew money to buy finger foods like french fries, and chicken fingers, and all of the unwrapped mints at the front of the restaurant. (The mints are usually free – you really didn’t have to buy them.)
3 Other Products That May Or May Not Tell Us If The U.S. Consumer Is Improving
1. Shovels! (To bury Facebook stock certificates in hope that they are worth more in 2062).
2. Fictional, virtual merchandise like virtual shovels in Farmville. This could mean the U.S. consumer is back, if you define three-year-olds who randomly press their parents iPhone screens as “consumers.” (p.s. parents, you should really disinfect that phone! Is that also why Clorox sales are up?)
3. Billboard space in Ohio and Florida. If billboard leases are on the rise, maybe it’s for the one time reason of blanketing battleground states with ads as the election approaches. Or maybe everyone is visiting Disney World and the “Disneyworld of Ohio” (formerly known as the Columbus Disney Store.) And maybe those visitors are using Clorox wipes to disinfect any toys purchased at these venues and buried in the background by the dog, next to the Facebook stock. It all makes sense now!
