Pearl

LATEST ARTICLES ( 713 )

• Start as You Mean to Finish

  Like so many other days, Monday starts full of promise.The alarm, for instance, goes off in a convincing fashion, redolent with assurances of timely buses and... Read more

  Posted on 13 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION

• More Great Ideas That I Shall Send to HR

  I once worked at a place where the corporate bathroom was more like a living room: couches, a little TV, even a little sewing kit for those early-morning seam... Read more

  Posted on 12 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION

• Funny. She Didn't Strike Me as Violent...

  When you hear the reports in the other blogs – and you will – please be sure to mention, somewhere in your comments, that I must’ve really been pushed because... Read more

  Posted on 11 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION

• Try It. Just Try A Little.

  I’m what they call, around these parts, a “good little eater”.This is code, I suspect, for “plate-licker”.What’s that? You want me to try a taste of something?... Read more

  Posted on 10 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION

• Come Sit Next to Me, Or Is The Bus Normally This Loud?

  I’ve developed a craving for one of those accordion buses. They’re almost twice as long as a regular bus. Think of the room...The urge for a bigger bus came... Read more

  Posted on 09 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION

• Those of You Expecting Raises, Please Step to the Front -- Not So Fast, You!

  Good morning, everyone; and welcome to Acme Grommet and Napkins State of the Quarter Address. Thank you so much for calling and logging in. For those of you... Read more

  Posted on 08 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION

• Let's Not Bicker and Argue Over Who Blistered Whom

  Because ongoing information regarding my footwear is intriguing no matter who you are, I am compelled to update you on my new shoes.The ones that only recently... Read more

  Posted on 07 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION

• Now What Do You Suppose Went on in HERE…

  Sometimes, I wonder what my purpose is. Where did I come from? Where am I going? Why am I here?I had wandered away from my desk in the grips of a looming head... Read more

  Posted on 06 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION

• I Support the Left, Though I'm Leaning to the Right...

  If you’re coming downtown, bring a sharp stick with you. The skyways, a second-floor Habitrail-like system linking buildings together and designed to keep... Read more

  Posted on 05 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION

• I Still Got It, Or You Asked for It When You Showed up in Columbia Heights

  Willie took me grocery shopping last night at the Rainbow in Columbia Heights.This is Willie's store. He knows this store; it’s the one he hits between work... Read more

  Posted on 04 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION

• I Don’t Know Nothin’ ‘Bout Elevators

  Hi. My name is Pearl, and I spend a lot of time in elevators. Hi, Pearl.As you would suspect, this daily vertical winching has been slowly turning me into... Read more

  Posted on 03 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION

• Might I Recommend a Wine Pairing? Or Don't Look Now, But There's Snails on Yer...

  

  You just knew the night was going to be special. I had, after all, been advised to both shave my legs AND brush my teeth.It is Saturday night, and Sarah and I... Read more

  Posted on 02 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION

• Wherein My Father Relates the Tale of the Hand

  

  My father drove the 600 mile round-trip every weekend.“It was 1960,” he says, fiddling with the woodstove. “Mumma and I had been married a couple of months,... Read more

  Posted on 01 November 2012 HUMOR, SELF EXPRESSION