Gray Eyed Athena

LATEST ARTICLES ( 197 )

• May Day

  I wear black all winter long.  I hate the cold, the dark, the wet, the heavy, confining clothing.  I hate winter.And then spring arrives and I come alive; I... Read more

  Posted on 01 May 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Transitioning

  An aged mother swathed in mourning clothesa morning coat, dark and cloisteredShe goes everywhere in black, a mother crow, shriveled and puckered with age and th... Read more

  Posted on 01 May 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Waking up

  These crests and slumps of my sleep deprivation and all the compounding effects on my mood, appetite, energy, and general will to live are almost as exhausting... Read more

  Posted on 30 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Weekend Dinner, 300 Calories

  

  I made a gluten free pizza over the weekend using a gluten free pizza crust mix with buckwheat and teff.  The texture of the crust was perfect– thin and crispy... Read more

  Posted on 29 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Stalemate

  In a dozey daze, once again.  I am embarrassed to say this, because it happens so much more frequently than I am comfortable with, but I had to leave work... Read more

  Posted on 26 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Cibophobia and Safe Food List

  I’m starting to be plagued by fear that the calorie contents in my app for food tracking or on the food labels themselves aren’t accurate.  What if... Read more

  Posted on 24 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Head Cold Life

  This cold is kicking my butt.  I was able to grab four hours of sleep last night (an improvement over two hours of sleep the night before) so I don’t feel nearl... Read more

  Posted on 24 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Lazy Girl

  She was taking the turn too wide, that man appeared from nowhere, she heard the thud.  To keep driving?  Not to look in the rearview mirror?  Pretend and hope... Read more

  Posted on 24 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Dinner Last Night, 450 Calories

  

  I made a delicious spring dinner last night of steamed swiss chard, roasted pork tenderloin, and fingerling potatoes with fresh chives from the garden. Read more

  Posted on 23 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Sore Throat, Sleepy, Only 1.6 Pounds from Next Goal

  I’ve been fighting a sore throat for over a day and I’m sure that this is due in large part to my weakened immune system from being so sleep-deprived. Read more

  Posted on 23 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Spring Sunset on the Beach

  

  Outside of the beach where I grew up, this is my favorite beach in Maine.  I raced over to it a couple of nights ago after work to capture the perfect pink of... Read more

  Posted on 22 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Eros

  Sex gets better as I lose weight.  I know Joe isn’t even that observant and he never had an issue with my body before, but I certainly had an issue with... Read more

  Posted on 22 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Dinner with Alyson

  

  I fasted all day in preparation for this delicious meal at my best friend’s house this past Saturday evening… I’m guessing the calorie total was in the 800-850... Read more

  Posted on 22 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Intermezzo

  Hello friends–  I think the spring air and the desire to be away from my keyboard has left me with less time to type, but certainly not any less to say. Read more

  Posted on 22 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Withdrawal, “have You Lost Weight?”, Keeping the Candle Burning

  I’ve felt a little muted by the tragedies in Boston on Monday; the violence so close to home always rattles me.  It’s hard to feel safe anywhere, knowing... Read more

  Posted on 17 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Post 500, and Coming Out.

  

  Today marks my 500th post. This is meaningful to me for many reasons, but the biggest is that I have watched myself, in my writing, become increasingly honest... Read more

  Posted on 13 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Arboretum Day

  In my dreams I see trees.The birch tree I slammed into while on my skis, the oak tree I slammed into while in my car.  I would wake up at that awful moment of... Read more

  Posted on 12 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Everything Hurts; Sleeping Can Help

  

  I am so tired.  I have plateaued in more ways than one.  Despite my consistent diet restriction to 750-800 calories, the scale hasn’t moved at all this week. Read more

  Posted on 12 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Revel

  Last night I dreamt we climbed steep stairs to a dance floor in the sky and danced with wild abandon, sweat and spirit flying off our lithe bodies and I was... Read more

  Posted on 11 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION

• Agares

  Last night I dreamt that I burned down a city while dark demons with painted faces followed me around and hissed and spied while I watched buildings... Read more

  Posted on 10 April 2013 SELF EXPRESSION