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A colleague of mine in the dating world, Single Dating Diva, asked me a question. She asked me “what is cheating”? Or more correctly, she said that someone had sent her a question saying “How do you define cheating?”
My comment to her was that if someone had thought to ask that question, they were already doing something that they felt guilty about and wanted someone to help their guilty conscience. Cheating does show that there is a problem in the relationship that needs to be worked out.
Single Dating Diva wrote a whole post called Can you define cheating? which is worth reading. Single Dating Diva divides cheating into three categories:
- Physical Cheating, which is when you have a physical sexual relationship with someone other than your partner.
- Emotional Cheating, which is when you have a full blown relationship with someone without even meeting them in person. I know someone who almost got a divorce because of this.
- Mental Cheating, which is thinking, lusting after and daydreaming about someone other than your partner.
As for “Mental Cheating”, this really got me thinking. My friend, Dirty in Public, wrote a rebuttal to exactly that definition, Mental Cheating.
I heard someone once say, “It does not matter where you cook, as long as you come home to eat.” That is fantasizing. Question is how far it can go. How many men lust after Angelina Jolie, who I do not think is as good-looking as Bar Raphaeli or Anne Hathaway anyway, and how many women fantasize after Daniel Craig and so-called sexy men? Kill Me Now!
A comment on her site was “Any act involving another person that you cannot bring yourself to share with your partner IS cheating.” Is it that simple? Thoughts?
