Not everything was/is horrible in my cancer journey.
I have worked very closely with my primary physician. He has guided me through chronic Lyme disease and then Long Covid (which unfortunately also made my Lyme symptoms flare – great fun.) We have always worked as a team, I’ve brought him books and articles and he has made suggestions on things that I could try based on his experience. He’s also pushed back when he thought he needed to – “before we try that, let’s take a look at this.”
He’s the kind of doctor who sees you as a full member of your health team (sounds obvious. but so many docs see themselves as Gods over the minions.)
When I got my diagnosis of cancer, my doc knew it was going to be tough. He knew I was a fighter, but he also knew I’d be questioning everything.
He knew me.
When I had my first appointment with him as a “cancer patient” (you seem to lose all other labels once you are diagnosed with cancer) he turned to me and said “Cancer is a family disease. We need to make sure that your family is supported and that you get the support you need.”
What an incredibly simple, but powerful statement.
He knew I was in for a rough ride, he didn’t minimize it, instead he let me know that he was here for me.
For the most part, I stood on my own (and when I say my own, I mean with the support of an incredible community of friends.)
But when my first surgeon wouldn’t prescribe pain meds for complications following surgery (oh, we don’t prescribe pain meds *after* surgery) my doc called her cruel and wrote a script.
And when I couldn’t control my anxiety before my third major operation, explaining that my head understood the necessity of more surgery but that my heart was freaking out because it knew what was coming – (let’s call it what it really is Cancer-PTSD), he prescribed a mild anti-anxiety medication. I didn’t use much of it, but just knowing it was there to use if I needed it made all the difference in the world.
His ongoing care of and for me, has made a HUGE difference in this hellscape called cancer. He empowered me to continue to fight and continue to push back, all the time with me knowing that he was there to catch me if I should fall.
May everyone who is diagnosed with cancer be lucky enough to have someone who has their back like this.
