If the thought of yet another lap through the mall fills you with existential dread, be not afraid. Frugal Portland fixed a gimlet eye on PDX’s holiday entertainment options and ferreted out a handful that allow you to enter into the festive spirit without a sinking sensation in your checking account. Not because we’re Scrooges but because we happen to believe, along with the pop lyricists, that money can’t buy you love and that the best things in life are free.
SantaCon
When: Dec. 9, from noon
Where: TBA
How much: Free to participate (drinks extra)
My husband and I unwittingly stumbled into SantaCon on our first date and spent a hilarious hour watching sloshed Santas hugging, mugging, and falling out of chairs. It was a good start. An anarchic bar crawl of dozens of versions of Good Old St. Nick, SantaCon has helped to keep Portland weird for over 20 years. Participants don red suits, white beards, and running shoes to sprint, dash, or stumble through the city, imbibing numerous rounds of festive beverages along the way.
Be sure to check the website for exact location and rules of the event.
Holiday Choral Performance at Central Library
When: Dec. 9, 10:30 a.m.
Where: Central Library
How much: Free
Need a break from holiday Muzak? Get down to the Central Library for a performance by the 60-strong Heart of the Valley Children’s Choir. This intimate performance in the Collins Gallery is first come, first served, so grab a coffee and brunch-y bite en route and get there early. The choir, made up of 10 to 18 year old singers from the mid-Willamette Valley, performs all over the world. Don’t miss this chance to enjoy their musical gifts right here in Portland.
Hipster Santa
Where: Pioneer Place
When: Until Dec. 14, opening hours
How much: Free to visit
When your kids are too cool for plain old Father Christmas, you need Hipster Santa, the gift-giving denizen with Portland flair. He’s got the beard (of course) plus tattoos and hip threads. It’s free to visit and ogle the tats, though if you want the photo package, complete with a downloadable e-book, it’ll cost $39.99. Alternatively, buy your kids a hot chocolate and take them on a hipster-spotting stroll. She (or he) who counts the most beards wins!
Dinner and Ugly Holiday Sweater Bar Crawl
When: Dec. 16, 8 p.m.
Where: TBA
How much: Free to participate (food + drinks extra)
Vegan activism + ironic clothing + alcohol. Incredibly, not a Portlandia sketch but the Try Vegan PDX holiday bar crawl. Break out your ugliest festive sweater (preferably not wool) for a night of drinking and anti-animal-cruelty advocacy. After a bite to eat, crawlers will embark on a tour of local watering holes, hanging pro-vegan posters on telephone posts and bulletin boards as they go.
Potluck in the Park Volunteering
When: Dec 10, 17, and 24. from 2 p.m.
Where: Waterfront park, under Hawthorne Bridge
How much: Free
Volunteering with Potluck in the Park is giving that will fill your heart, not empty your pockets. This non-profit organization has dished up free Sunday lunches in Portland for over 25 years and several hundred of our neighbors count on it for a hot meal each week. Sharing a few hours of your time to set up, serve, and clean will help ensure the tradition continues. Sign up via the website, or email volunteer coordinator Norm Rice ([email protected]).
Snowfall
When: Daily through Dec. 24, check website for hours
Where: Pioneer Place
How much: Free
Growing up in Oregon, my only experience of a white Christmas was the Bing Crosby film of the same name (which I recommend). If you crave something more tangibly snow-like, scoot along to Pioneer Place where the snow will be falling at regular intervals between now and Christmas.
Maddax Woods Christmas Light Trail
When: Dec. 1-31, 4 to 9 p.m. daily
Where: West Linn
How much: FREE
Slip away from the city bustle for a soothing stroll through Maddax Woods to the Willamette River. Twinkling Christmas lights guide your way, illuminating the park, and giving you a chance to spot the 45 animal sculptures dotted throughout. They represent the actual creatures who live in, or pass through, this former private home turned city park.
There you have it: seven fun, frugal holiday activities to get you into the spirit of the season. Running the gamut from quintessentially Portland (Hipster Santa, anyone?) to incredibly traditional (a holiday caroling presentation), you’re sure to find something here that appeals to your sense of seasonal whimsy.
Happy Holidays!
