I just read a great article on the Nov 2011 issue of Wired magazine called "The Scientific way to...Find a Soul Mate", as part of a their Wired’s Lab-Tested, Muppet-Vetted Formulas for Smartifying Your Life. In the article you can scientifically learn how to swat a fly, navigate a crowd, keep your earbuds from from tangling and more!
The one I was interested in is the Soul Mate tip which reads:
"There’s a probabilistic approach to finding the love of your life, and it even has a name: satisficing, a combination of satisfy and suffice. OK, technically, satisficing refers to getting a good enough outcome when you’re lacking complete information about your options. But isn’t dating like that? According to Peter Todd, professor of informatics and cognitive science at Indiana University, the question always comes down to this: “Do you keep searching and hope something better will come along, or do you stop searching when you find something that looks pretty good?”
In the face of this conundrum, the best strategy for picking a mate is to date enough people to establish some baseline standards, then settle down with the next person you meet who exceeds the bar. According to Todd, you should have a baseline after dating roughly 12 people. He’s dubbed this theory the Twelve-Bonk Rule, and it can also be applied to picking the right employee or choosing a home. So, if you’ve dated fewer than 12 people, you should feel free to keep looking. If you’ve had 30 relationships, odds are you’re being too picky. Quit obsessing over your new paramour’s dorky laugh.—Judy Dutton"
So that settles it! I'm too picky! I never wanted to believe my sister when she says it (over and over), but if Wired magazine prints it then I can't argue no more.
Now what I could do, is establish my personal baseline standards based on the next 12 people I date. But what constitutes dating nowadays? A few dinner dates or a few months? I'm sure I should discount one-night stands, but what about friends with benefits? Ah well, I'll just have to figure it out as I go along as I usually do!
