Family Magazine

Deconstructing Deepak

By Guerrillamom @mariaguido

Deconstructing Deepak


Translation: you're late.  Or, it's not possible to be late, because now is also 10 minutes ago.  Or, time doesn't exist so buy a ticket to my yoga retreat.
Deconstructing Deepak
Translation:  Stop looking at me.  Why is everybody looking at me?  I want Cheetos.
Deconstructing Deepak
Translation:  Do these Versace frames make me look fat?  I don't think so, either.
Deconstructing Deepak
Translation:  I've never completed an NYT crossword puzzle.  Ever.
Deconstructing Deepak
Translation:  Buy a ticket to my yoga retreat.
Deconstructing Deepak
Um, what?
I apologize in advance if I am poking fun at anyone's Guru, but I've been laughing so hard I nearly peed myself, so I want to share the joy.  
Coming next week:  Whose tweets are more annoying- Mario Batali, or Deepak Chopra?

In other news:  I'm on day 8 of my cleanse.  Everyone around me is still alive, and still likes me (I think).  Caffeine withdrawal headaches are gone, and I'm down 4 pounds.  

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