Family Magazine

Correcting with Respect

By Monicairvine
Correcting with RespectThis month, I would like to discuss the etiquette skill of correcting our children.  What?  You didn’t know there was an etiquette skill involved in this?  Well, there is.  Let’s review our definition of proper etiquette for those new readers who may be joining us.  Proper etiquette is defined as, “helping those around us to feel more valued and more comfortable.”  With this definition in mind, it is important that we not only apply it to those outside of our families, but that we apply it with our most treasured relationships, our families.  As we do so, it will help us establish more loving relationships, including the relationships we have with our children.  Now before I go on, I do not wish to address the controversial topic of discipline.  That is a subject I leave to the judgment, wisdom and love of parents.  However, I do wish to discuss how we approach and carryout whatever discipline we choose to use.
If you remember, we have discussed before that it is not polite to correct others in front of others.  This means that we never “call out” someone in public, or in front of others, because this might embarrass or belittle them.  If a correction is in need, we simply wait for the opportunity when we can pull the person aside and in private, politely give the correction.  This same principle applies to our children. WE NEVER WANT TO EMBARRASS OUR CHILDREN.  Now hold on.  Breathe.....Let’s discuss the solution to this dilemma.  Do our children sometimes need correcting when we are in public?  Do chickens lay eggs?  Of course they do.  Sometimes those little angels of ours are worse than a tic on a hound, however, we must do our best to show complete respect and honor to our children.  Please, please don’t ever yell, spank, criticize, etc. your children in the presence of others, even their siblings.  This means that you have to separate yourself and your child and administer the correction in private.  Sometimes, due to the safety of your other children, you cannot separate yourself at the time.  In that case, you will simply have to pull your child to the side and quietly acknowledge that the correction will happen at a later time.
I know I’m suggesting something that will be difficult at times.  I had all boys in my home, so trust me when I say that this takes great self control and patience.  I can promise you however, that as we make an effort to show respect to our children by striving to protect their dignity, our children’s love and respect for us will increase as well.  As our children realize that correcting them comes from love and devotion, instead of anger and frustration, they will learn to honor our words and our actions.  No, of course it doesn’t mean they will always love or enjoy being corrected, but they will know that we correct because we love them. 
As we consider ways that we can show our children love and respect, I think it will help to simply consider how we would want someone to correct us.  Just because they’re children, doesn’t mean that we have a license to embarrass or humiliate them, regardless of their behavior.  It’s the principle of two wrongs, don’t make a right.  I think this is a topic worth spending some time pondering and considering.  Some day, our children will ponder our parenting when they are making decisions for their own children.  I hope we leave them a legacy of trust, honor, love and encouragement as we help shape their precious lives.
Have a great month.
Monica Irvine
a.k.a. Mary Manners

You Might Also Like :

Back to Featured Articles on Logo Paperblog

These articles might interest you :

  • Shilo Sanders- Son Of Deion Sanders Thanks Courts For Allowing Him To Live With...

    Shilo Sanders- Deion Sanders Thanks Courts Allowing Live With Pilar

    ChristianNews Shilo Sanders, the son of NFL Hall of Famer,  Deion Sanders took to twitter to “thank” the courts for allowing him to live with his mother, Pilar... Read more

    The 04 August 2017 by   Firstladyb
  • “I Feel Great”

    Feel Great”

    Jakub went to his doctor's office believing that he had a back injury, but returned with a chocking diagnosis instead. He had type 2 diabetes - in spite of... Read more

    The 04 August 2017 by   Dietdoctor
  • July Allotment Recap (2/2)

    July Allotment Recap (2/2)

    Sunday afternoon saw us return bravely to 24a even though there were more thundery showers foretold by the weatherman. I will admit that I guffawed at the... Read more

    The 04 August 2017 by   Chrryblossomtat2
  • Culinary Delicacies in Croatia- What to Eat and Drink in Croatia

    Culinary Delicacies Croatia- What Drink Croatia

    In my earlier post, we spoke about how Croatia is a stunning European destination, let us now see what are the culinary delicacies in Croatia or what you can... Read more

    The 04 August 2017 by   Kash Pals
  • #Golf Training Aids Spotlight: The Delta Putt

    #Golf Training Aids Spotlight: Delta Putt

    Do you consider yourself to be a strong putter or do you feel you could improve your make percentage on the green? Most amateurs could use help with the flat... Read more

    The 04 August 2017 by   Golfforbeginners
  • Three Incredible Hikes in Southern Iceland3 Min Read

    Three Incredible Hikes Southern Iceland3 Read

    Nature takes center stage in Iceland, where there's a stunning view around every bend: massive glaciers, expansive lava fields, powerful waterfalls, black sand... Read more

    The 04 August 2017 by   Healthytravelblog
  • What I Wore: Daytime Pajamas

    What Wore: Daytime Pajamas

    Pajama top: ELOQUII (14) | Pajama pants: ELOQUII (14) | Shoes: ASOS (similar) | Earrings: J. Crew ( same in different colors, similar concept in same color) |... Read more

    The 04 August 2017 by   Wardrobeoxygen