Family Magazine

Choose Resilience

By Sandwichedboomers @SandwichBoomers

resilience right aheadTo one degree or another we all suffer adversity and and experience setbacks. But have you heard about post-traumatic growth? It’s always possible to bounce back.

Whether you’re hit in the face with a crisis or making a slow transition to the next chapter in your life, expect a cascade of emotions–anxiety, the desire to hold on, fear, maybe even a sense of freedom. If you step back, take a deep breath and face the situation squarely, you can’t help but grow from the challenges:

Look into your part. You have a choice about how to see your situation at this moment and what attitude you want to assume. Try not to be a victim or feel helpless. And no matter who initiated what happened, don’t focus on accusation and blame. You can’t control others but you can change yourself. To work toward a more positive outcome, take whatever responsibility is yours and figure out what you need to do next.

Look at yourself. Put on your detective hat and examine your present circumstances. Is the increase in stress due to finances, work, family or other relationships? Your reaction to problems can be compounded by events that are outside of your control. Take charge of what is within your reach. And begin to assess how to improve your competency in areas such as management, communication, delegation or conflict resolution. Track the changes you’re working on as you integrate them into your emotional toolbox.

Look for an action plan. Explore the cause and effects of the issues you’re confronting. Whether it’s about the end of your marriage, the loss of a job or the death of a loved one, set some long range and relevant goals. And think about short-term objectives that can help you reach them. Know that your determination will build confidence as you prepare to take action. And when you begin to move forward, you’ll feel stronger knowing that you are perfectly capable of showing up for yourself.

All of our thoughts are mental products. Although they do not necessarily reflect an absolute reality, they do represent how we feel. You can begin to see a crisis as a challenge by reframing your thoughts. Turn anxiety into energy through focusing on the possibilities instead of the negatives. And as you change your mindset, you’ll be amazed by your growing resilience.


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