Ever since reading the first Beyond Consequences, Logic, and Control (BCLC), book more than a year ago, I’ve become a big fan. I’ve finally finished Beyond Consequences, Logic, and Control volume 2, and at first I was tempted to say that I preferred the second installment. But, the ideas behind volume 2 would actually be difficult to understand without the foundation of volume 1. So, although volume 2 provides a lot of practical advice, it’s still worthwhile to start with volume 1.
Both volumes explain that traditional consequences, logic, and control, do not work with children with attachment difficulties. This has proven to be so true with my children. As I mentioned, volume 2 provides tons of examples, and demonstrates how to apply the BCLC method. This is incredible helpful, because although I love the BCLC theory, I am sometimes unsure of how to use it in my own home.
So, volume 2 begins with the BCLC principles, but then devotes a number of chapters to specific behaviors such as poor social skills, demanding behaviors, defensive attitudes, and homework. In each chapter, the author, Heather Forbes, explains how to use BCLC for each situation and even includes real life examples of how BCLC changed the dynamic in a home.
Whenever I read any of Heather’s works, I’m always challenged to be a better parent, to be more loving and understanding. In fact, in the book, Heather refers often to “love-based parenting” as opposed to “fear-based.” In the first chapter, Heather writes, “Love really is enough. It simply takes putting unconditional love into action to help any child find his way back to this place of peace, joy, confidence, and safety.”
I’m planning to read Heather’s other book, “Dare to Love,” next, but it may be a while before I get there. I’ll be sure to post a review when I’m done.
