He does not punish us for all our sins; he does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve. For his unfailing love toward those who fear him is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth. He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west. The LORD is like a father to his children, tender and compassionate to those who fear him. For he knows how weak we are; he remembers we are only dust. -Psalms 103:10-14
A baby is a blessing whether born inside or outside of wedlock and psalms 139:13-16 pertains to children conceived under both circumstances.
I played with dolls as a child with no desire to have a baby when I had gotten older.
Then, for a period of time in early adulthood, I considered having one.
The only problem was I wanted a baby/child without having a husband.
I didn’t want to get married. I wanted to be a single mother. I wanted to have a daughter of my own just like I cherished the close and loving relationship shared between my mother and I in a single parent home raised with the rest of our family.
I didn’t have the money needed for invitro fertilization at a sperm bank and I didn’t want any continuous sexual relationship or commitment.
I had been acknowledging during my teenage years to those who inquired why I didn’t have a boyfriend or didn’t want a husband that, “The only reason I would ever have sex is to conceive a child”.
I was a virgin and content. Even within a marriage I didn’t want to be sexually intimate. I knew I was asexual and there is no sin in asexuality.
I had no intention to have sex unless it was to make a baby and I sincerely wished as a woman I didn’t have to have intercourse in order to have a baby.
Now, we all know there is sin according to God when it comes to premarital sex. I thought it was unfair to have to be with a man to get pregnant.
A lot of people thought my feelings and thoughts were strange, many had never heard of young ladies speaking in that fashion. The majority of girls were interested in guys and sex. My statement was not common I was even told that I was rare.
As I look back, I am so grateful to God that it never happened and I didn’t bring a child into the world. I really didn’t need one, it was just a passing fancy.
The circumstance went against his plan anyhow as I wanted to do things my way with having a child out of wedlock. I absolutely refused the idea of marriage.
I wouldn’t had truly wanted any precious baby of mine being born into this evil and cruel, sick world.
But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. -1 John 1:9
