"Happy Sunday!"
When I drank I never worried. When I was not drinking I always worried. Have a drink,...no worries! No drinks,...many worries! It sounds like that word, insanity! Keep doing what your doing, you'll keep getting what you always got! Insanity!
Half the reasons why I would not stop drinking was the fact that alcohol took my worries away,...so I thought! Alcohol did so many magical things for me, why the heck would I stop using it? So, I thought! Alcohol was the crutch to all my character defects. Alcohol was the mask I put on when I really wanted to hide. Alcohol allowed me to feel, think and live in denial of all the truths I needed to see, but wasn't ready to let them go or face them head on. I fought Alcohol! I fought worry! I won!
When I chose to stop drinking I knew I was ready to breath on my own. I was ready to see on my own. I was ready to face me on my own and everything else regardless of how painful, challenging, worrisome or fearful it would be at times,...I was ready! I was willing! I was teachable! I was not worried!
How did I get from always being worried and using alcohol as a crutch to not using and not feeling the anxieties of worry? Spiritual awakenings! The more I was willing to be open minded to my spiritual awakenings and know and understand the message in them, that allowed me to worry less. Spiritual awakenings helped me to be more patient with decisions and not impulsive about decisions or choices I needed to make in my life. Believe it or not, spiritual awakenings happen to us all the time. Did you know that? Have you ever had one? Have you ever experienced it? What was it like for you? What did you learn about yourself along with what was going on in your life?
Spiritual awakenings do not have to be huge. They are those little words that people may say to us that opens new doors to our new spiritual paths. Spiritual awakenings occur when we are ready to let go, look and listen for the message and grow spiritually from within. Spiritual awakenings are my higher powers way of talking to me, telling me, showing me...that I am not alone and that there is a better way to live, of doing things and this is what taught me faith in my higher power. This is what taught me trust in my higher power. This is what gave me peace through any challenge I had faced throughout my recovery and perhaps still have to face in my life to come. Without the faith I carry in my heart and soul today, I would never had found peace. I would never have lived worry free! If I never became willing to see my spiritual awakenings and learn from all the challenges, ups and downs throughout my recovery, I would just be some sober individual with all the worry and anxiety still weighing on my soul. I wanted a loving and forgiving recovery! I wanted a freeing recovery! I wanted a worry free recovery! I have a worry free recovery!
Today, I have bouts of worry like any other human may face, but it is never as bad or controlling as it once was. I have faith today! I have sobriety! I have no worries!
Do you struggle with worry? If so, try and look for the message. Try and look for the spiritual awakenings that are constantly happening around you. You just have to be willing enough, patient enough and spiritually enough in order to experience it, understand it and learn from it. You will eventually be worry free!
I will run today with no worries and if I should feel a worry coming on I will allow myself to look for the message and know that I can face anything with my higher power!
Sobriety Fitness by Cathy Shuba is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
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