Crawford Now Reports Soreness in Ankle, Finger, Toe, Neck, and Ear

By Callofthegreenmonster @cotgm


The string of bad luck for outfielder Carl Crawford continues. Amidst reports that his elbow--the injury preceeded by his hamstrings woes and wrist problems--may keep him out for months, Crawford yesterday reported soreness in his ankle, finger, toe, and neck.

"There's also something going on with my ear, yo," said a discouraged Crawford, while twisting his pinkie in his left ear.  "But they tell me that's just earwax, and hell, that I can play through. I also had the hiccups, man, but I drank a glass of water while standing on my head and now I'm cool."

GM Ben Cherington remained optimistic. "His baseball activities are limited until we clear up these latest problems," he said. "But he took a walk yesterday, and lemme tell you, he looked fantastic.  We were all excited. But evidently it took a lot out of him, because of these new injuries that have cropped up."

Call of the Green Monster talked to Red Sox team doctor Ian Jury, who told us that while Crawford's injuries could not be regarded as serious, he will not be on a baseball field any time soon. "We're looking at roughly six years before he'll be able to start throwing a baseball," the doctor reported. "Unfortunately I'm told his contract will be up by then."

The ever-optimistic Cherington said. "Think positive. We can use the insurance money on Crawford to sign our next free agent disaster!"

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bill@callofthegreenmonster.com