NBA Fandom: The Loopholes

Fans of hapless teams rejoice. You may have an out! Here I present a short explaination of how you can to escape miserable ownership.
The NBA, above the other major team sports leagues, is a player driven league. That isn’t an accident. The NBA, especially with David Stern at the head, has decided to market players more than teams. Contrary to what NBA TV commercials want you to believe, nobody goes to see the Hawks play. In the MLB or NFL it’s about hated rival teams, but with the NBA if you hate a team that usually means you hate the star player. The contrapositive tends to hold as well.  If you love an NBA team, that’s probably a result of loving the star player. These inalienable truths are the reason that NBA fandom isn’t quite like other sports.  Therefore the normal rules of fandom don’t apply.  While the loopholes of NBA fandom don’t give “true fans” the right to hop around following whoever is the hot player of the moment, it does allow you some wiggle room.  Without further ado here are the NBA Loopholes.

The Loophole Exceptions

  If your hometown NBA team has won more than 20% of the Championships you are automatically disqualified from exploiting any of the following NBA Fandom loopholes. See you in 2032 Celtics fans!¹

Follow the Leader

  Prerequisites: None  Description: The first and most obvious loophole is following your star. If the star player of your team, or even just your favorite player on the team leaves for greener pastures, then you are within your fan rights to follow them to their next team.As acrimonious as the LeBron James exit from Cleveland was, I estimate that their wasn’t a single Cavs fans that took advantage of their ability to become Heat fans with LeBron leaving.²

Scout ‘em Out

  Prerequisites: Your team has been hapless for 5 years, or you have “Follow the Leader” rights and don’t exercise them.  Description: With your team squandering five straight lottery picks you now have the opportunity to do your own scouting work by picking up a college player and following the team that eventually drafts him.  This is because you can be sure that if he is talented, it won’t be your team.

The Mulligan

  Prerequisites: you made Jan Veselý or Austin Rivers your “Scout em Out” pick  Description:  Pretty self-explanatory you get 1 chance every 5 years to try again, because   scouting might actually be kind of hard. Especially this year. As a last token of advice I’d say hold out until next year.So there you have it downtrodden NBA fans. ³ Happy Scouting!