N was another tricky customerI was going to go with numbBut then decided on night time As I think I can write more about that Up until a few years agoI was most definitely a night personDuring my drug using days I would typically get up in the evening Stay up all night And go to bed in the morning It wasn't unusual not to see daylight for weeks on end When I first started using drugs I associated them with night time It was some thing you did at night At the weekend Even when I first started taking heroinI still associated it with night I remember the first time I saw someone using heroin first thing in the morning It had never occurred to me to do that But it seemed like a good ideaSo I started using in the morning tooThis is how an addict is made My drug use began to bleed in to the day time The weekend began to get longer and longer Until my drug use became an every day thing ButAs with everything You take the bad with the goodAnd with heroin Comes a physical addictionIt's a cat and mouse game to stay one step ahead of sicknessAnd I was always playing catch upAnd can remember nights when I had no drugs And no money to get drugs Those nights were sheer torture As I've said before I was a greedy addict And whatever I had I took there and thenLeaving nothing for the following day or days Withdrawal is a horrific thing You will start to withdraw about 24 hours after your last usage It starts off quite mild Your eyes will begin to streamYour nose will run You will yawn continuously Then your muscles will begin to get sore A dull ache in your bones that saps the energy right out of you By now you will take to the bedAs you won't be able to do anything other than lie down and wait it out You will sweat profusely Alternating between hot and coldThe sheets of your bed will be damp with the sweat What ever way you lie You can't get comfortable And even though you are mentally and physically wrecked Sleep eludes you Then comes the stomach cramps The vomiting The diarrhoea As the last remnants of the drug leaves your body You are now in full blown withdrawalYou are climbing the walls Hallucinating with fever It feels like your body is trying to turn inside out If only you had the drug One smoke One turn onCould put an end to all of this The night is endless And everything seems worse at night You are lonely So alone It seems like you are the only one in the whole world who is awake The nightmare goes on Until you find someone you can borrow money off Or you manage to drag yourself out of bed to find money somehow And when you finally get the drugThe feeling of the sickness draining out of your body is the best feeling everYou immediately stop sweating The ache in your bones vanishes The mental torture subsides All is well Until the next time
Over the years I have turned from a night owl In to a morning bird Nowadays I don't stay up past midnight And I am up between 7am and 8am every morning I like to go out and do my bits and pieces in the morning There is something lovely about that time of the day When there are only a few people around When it's still and quietAnd the world hasn't quite woken up yet When the surfers Dog walkers And runners are all about It's a magical time of the dayNight time can be magical tooBut I just don't have energy or the inclination to be a night owl any more
Which are youA night owlOr a morning bird?