Fast forward a year plus some and that marathon was quickly approaching and shortly before it I had the urge to go to Kaua'i. In all reality, I was stoked that I could meet Dean Karnazes at the EXPO and dear hubby agreed to watch darling daughter while I took off to the neighbor island for two days and one night to run the half marathon two weeks before my first marathon. It was my first time away from darling. It was hard but I needed the refresher in my life. But what really touched me on a deep spiritual level was the course. I felt my dad along that run. It still brings happy chills to me and as I stand here typing I am smiling, feeling happy chills, and paused to take a deep soothing breath. Oh to go back to Kaua'i and run and this time....the marathon. The marathon that has been calling me and tempting me to come back to the island I promised darling daughter I would never go to without her again.
That call has been there every single year since I ran there in 2011. Finally, I am listening to the call. The time is right. We are going to Kaua'i and I am going to run the marathon! The idea scares me to some extent (that course profile looks harsh) but excites me in other ways. But why? Why Kaua'i? Why the calling?
In a recent event newsletter JT Service, the Founder of Soul Focus Sports, asked What? How? Why?
For the what the focus is on running the marathon. That is what I am going to do.
For the how the focus in on training. That is what I am doing.
For the why...that is the big question. The question that varies for each and every participant. The first two we can all pretty much agree on but the final, the why, that is what keeps each of us going.
My why has evolved over the years from because it is what my spirit is meant to do. I discovered that lesson in 2010 but the why can't always stay so small and simplistic. Yes, it is what my spirit is meant to do. That is still true but I have a deeper understanding of the why. God gave me running feet and the ability to run every day since December 30, 2011. I have run many marathons during my streak and am able to keep running. I have run through hard times and good times. I have run to keep depression and stress at bay. I run to find my peace and to grow deeper in my faith. But running isn't just about me.
Through my journey I discovered the why wasn't just me and my spirit but bigger. Sure it makes me a better mom and wife. That is all fine and dandy but the why is bigger. The why brought me to sign up for I Run for Michael and to be matched with Toby, an awesome boy who happens to have Down syndrome. The why is that my running is bigger than me. I run for Toby, I run for Down syndrome awareness, I run to remember my dad, I run for those who can't, I run because it is what God wants me to do. I am running His race in life. Sure I chase times. I would love to break a 4 hour marathon one day but that is a personal dream. If I never achieve it that is okay because some why's are bigger than a time on a clock. I am running to support Toby and his family, to show darling daughter that moms can run, work and still be home in time to cook a home-cooked meal, to be a happier, fitter wife for my husband, and to do God's work. Only He knows how long I will keep running and when my streak will end but God-willing, I will keep running for Him to a ripe old age.
But through all this I never answered why Kauai?
Because I still see that old woman outside her house wrapped in a blanket surrounded by her family watching us crazy runners running by. She had her oxygen tank by her and looked so peaceful and happy. I cried. I felt my dad there in that woman watching us. I felt love and peace on that course...love and peace I haven't found on any other course. I want to go back. I want to feel that again and this time, I want my family with me.
Daily Gratitude: I am thankful for each day I can run.
Daily Bible Verse: Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. ~ 1 Corinthians 9:24