I asked for help, now everyone knows
but I don’t want everyone involved.
They struggle for so long on their own, trying to cope but sliding down the slope into desperation. So they open up and call for help.
Suddenly they find themselves in the spotlight, on everyone’s radar. They have parental attention, medical attention, and no one is letting them go.
All they want to do is hide again. Yes they want help, but on their own terms in their own time and often they regret asking in the first place. It is ‘comforting’ sitting in their own private hell and it seems far less painful and more safe than the prying outside world.
But as our counselor said, it’s no longer his burden alone. His team are committed to help and help they will. He is top priority and his NEEDS not WANTS will be met.
And that’s the clincher. NEEDS not WANTS. Often our wants are not healthy nor useful at certain times. What we NEED is essential and demands attention. My son (and daughter) need support, medicine, monitoring etc for his mental health and safety. His wants aren’t disregarded and are respected. But for now are on the back burner so to speak. Having this explained respectfully and gently means to my son, he knows he is heard and respected. But for now he need to let go of his wants and let others care for him and provide what he NEEDS to survive this period of time.