When I worked on my anxiety, I didn't only show up in the event but I also made a video, interviewed jury members, and some fellow bloggers, took selfies with them and asked fun questions. I got a compliment from the designer Rina Dhaka and my PR friend. I got to meet two new and important persons from MAX Fashion team who were kind enough to share their expectations from bloggers and how we bloggers are a good change in the marketing of brands and products.
Background
I was invited to Max Design Awards 2018 Jury Meet (that I am extremely grateful for) by just intending that I would like to attend more events. [I've got to work on refining my decision followed by intention.]If it wasn't for the PR person and friend who invited me and the finances involved, I could have skipped it. I have covered many events for this PR friend for free in the past and this wouldn't have been the exception if it wasn't for my health. I must confess that I quoted the rates I am being paid so I could skip if she refuses. And I wasn't guilty about it!
I have decided that I would attend an event if I have given my words because this is one of the values I would like to keep with me. So, I had to attend this event! My brain was not happy about it. It kept pushing me to list down the reasons why I shouldn't go. I knew it was my brain doing the talks because I was scared and I could hear my gut saying "you must go!"
The Anxiety Hits
Gave myself time to analyze what I am worried about! I just lied on my bed, feet curled in the blanket and fists clenched, eyes stoned staring at the ceiling. This empty time gave my head more time to wander and think about all the shitty things that could happen if I decided to attend.You're lying on the floor and
Staring at the ceiling.
Thinking of the place you
Have never seen before.… - Staring at the ceiling by Keane
These questions were what my mind asked me inherently...
a) What will you wear, Jiya? b) What questions would you ask? You would appear like a wanna-be!! c) Do you know how you goof-up when you are among strangers? d) How many times people have told you that you are too straightforward? Only diplomatic people are accepted these days. e) Do you know that you have to deliver a blog-post and social media posts if you go to this meet? Argh!! You would have to come up with your own content because you have stopped accepting and featuring press releases on SSU as they are! f) Remember your cervical pain and motion sickness? V won't be able to take you there, it means you would be all alone, on your own. What if you faint or start throwing-up? Remember that day when you had to jump out of office cab to puke on the side of the road!! g) OMG, let's not start with the gynae issues you have developed!
I am getting dizzy by writing this and tearing up because I was very scared!
How I Found Answers To My Anxious Questions?
"What questions would you ask? You would appear like a wanna-be!!" The biggest fear was that I didn't want to feel like a wanna-be. I didn't want to ask questions like an expert media reporter or highly fashion-forward blogger. I am none of them. I got the clarity "Be Yourself!"I decided to ask questions that I would like to know as if I was one of the contestants. I also wanted to ask something related to "shopping" (after all I wanted to make this blog everything about what and where we are shopping?). My brain started over-flowing with the possible questions I could ask, that I immediately typed in Google Keep where I jot down all of my thoughts when I can't write in my journal.
"What should I wear?" Something that just lifts my mood and adds a bit of glow on my face. Yellow was the color. I wanted to check Pinterest (12.4 K Monthly Viewers of SSU Pins) for ideas but I was "inspired" to take a look at Polyvore and created two sets with a yellow sweater and items that I already had in my closet. I just loved the idea and how it helped me visualize my look in reality.
"
Do you know how you goof-up when you are among strangers?" I thought about "goofing-up" a lot. My mind had clarity by now because I had taken care of my two important questions. But for this question, I had to be centered at home and in the jury meet. Here comes the "visualization" in my mind's eye. I saw myself cool and composed and not awestruck by the jury members. I had seen them on screen or on the internet before, I was still put-together. This is also called "prepaving" and I must say that the jury meet venue had a very calm and organized ambiance fulfilling what I had visualized."How many times people have told you that you are too straightforward? Only diplomatic people are accepted these days." I am not one of them and I like to ask questions when I
"Remember your cervical pain and motion sickness? V won't be able to take you there, it means you would be all alone, on your own. What if you faint or start throwing-up? Remember that day when you had to jump out of office cab to puke on the side of the road!!" I knew that I would not stay at home all the time thinking of it. There has to be a day when I decide to stand on my feet. So, I reminded myself that it is time for me to resume work very soon and this is just an opportunity to test my resilience.
There couldn't have been a better opportunity than this. I left the house at 13.30 and left for home at 16.40. I had drained and was almost unconscious in the Uber because of motion sickness. But I survived by resting my head on the window and inhaling chilling air. It made me really calm and awake despite my shutting eyelids that could have used 2 safety-pins to make them wide open.
SHARE ME
So here are 7 ways how I dealt with my anxiety before an important event that I enjoyed thoroughly. I am resuming work tomorrow and prepared for what comes ahead.
Before you go -
Let me know if I missed anything and how you deal with your anxiety.
*This post may contain affiliate links, products sent by brand/PR for consideration, paid content. Disclosure Policy