Now, I have to start by letting you know how Camille and I first met. We were at a sorority brunch in Chicago. Camille, new to the area, and I, a lifelong resident, were seated next to each other. We began with basic small talk, which quickly turned into a game of twenty questions as I pried her for information about which small town outside Portland, Oregon she was from. Turns out, not only is she from the town where my aunt and uncle lived for many years, Camille went to high school with my cousin and remembered what kind of car her drove (a blue Volvo station wagon that he STILL drives and boasts over 350,000 miles!). Needless to say, that moment was the start of a wonderful friendship.
And I am taking this moment to share my wonderful, exciting, and talented friend with all of you.
I recently sat down with Camille to hear more about her #sidehustle, which celebrates its first year anniversary next month. What started as a simple presentation to friends to share her insights into being "more datable," Camille now helps women step into their "Once upon a time..." stories through Girl Gets Date, and transforms wishes of princes and gentlemen into face-to-face conversations and meaningful dates.
AMT: I guess we should start at the beginning. Tell me about you. What makes you Camille Virginia?CV: I'm an only child, so I had to learn to share and be social in a different way than people who grew up with siblings. I'm from Portland, Oregon, but moved to Chicago when a company bought out the small company I worked for. I saw that as an opportunity to move to a bigger city. Now I've been in Chicago for five years and still in the healthcare consulting field.
AMT: What excites you in life?CV: My passions are all about traveling. I've been to five continents and 49 states - South Dakota still eludes me. I love trains. I rode the train from Portland to Chicago just for the fun of it. And I love craft beer, too. Being from Portland that's kind of a requirement. My favorite breweries are Widmer, Deschutes, and Rogue, all local there. And I love Revolution here [in Chicago].
AMT: When you moved to Chicago, what was the biggest life adjustment you had to make?CV: Public transportation! I had never taken public transportation and I wasn't used to people being in my circle of space. It really scared me for the first few months; now if I see three square inches of room on the morning Red Line I shove myself in there with no issue at all.
AMT: Looking at your work life, what would you say has been the biggest challenge in your career?CV: Keeping up with processes. When there aren't processes, when people are continually reinventing the wheel, I'll create something that's meant to last longer. My biggest challenge is making sure the work gets done on top of the effort put into streamlining the process. I have to make sure to slow down to make things smoother. It's all about keeping a balance.
AMT: You recently started a new venture. Tell me about your side hustle. I know that every time we talk something exciting is going on with it!CV: So, [I've put together] classes where I coach women on how to be approachable and tap into their own natural allure - to stay authentic to themselves - but also to [project themselves in ways that] make it okay for men to ask them out. And then, once they have the date, how to make great impressions and really get to know their date through questions, and very authentic small actions and shifts in personal mindset.
What it comes down to is that I'm an advocate for being nice to everyone. It makes it that much easier to talk to that cute guy in the grocery store if you've boosted up your social skills by simply being nice to everyone.
AMT: And how did this all come about?CV: Very organically. Two years ago this month, a couple girlfriends who worked with me pulled me aside and said, "Okay, Camille, how do you do it? How do you meet so many men and go on so many dates without doing online dating?" I had never really thought about it. They asked me to put it together for them in PowerPoint. So, I really had to think about it. What was my process? How could I tell he really wants to ask me out? So, I presented it to them, and that was the first iteration of the Master the Art of Allure + Approachability Workshop.
AMT: And how has this class developed since then?CV: I started teaching the workshop on Dabble last July, just two or three a month, and they kept selling out. I've now done almost 30 workshops. I had so much content that I actually created an online course that has twice the amount as the live workshop. I have almost 700 students in the online course and - believe it or not - three-quarters of them are men!
I've incorporated my own strategies of what works and what doesn't. I know the number of times I've been asked for my phone number is in the triple digits.
AMT: What have you found to be most rewarding about teaching this course?CV: First of all, meeting amazing women who are open to a new approach to dating. When they sign up for the workshop, they tend to have been really burned by online dating or they want a new approach, or they didn't know how to talk to a guy or didn't realize he was flirting with them. So, having [these women] over in my home and going through all my experiences and everything learned is giving them years' worth of lessons in a matter of hours. I did things wrong the first time and I learned how to do them right.
It's also giving them hope that there are wonderful men all around them. There are great guys online, but there's a great guy on the bus with you, too. People treat you better when they have to look you in the eye. If you can smile at a stranger, you never know where it will lead! And how cool, you go out for errands and come back with a date. It's more fun. What's not to love about that?
AMT: How do you see your workshop growing from here?CV: I actually just published two new classes. The first is on flirting: Master Your Own Flirting Style. We're going to do role playing and talk about different flirting profiles so women can find what feels authentic to them.
The second, well, there's an episode of Sex and the City where Carrie is giving a talk and isn't being really articulate about how she meets these men. So, [I'm taking the workshop out of classroom and] that's what I'm doing, but with street festivals. I'm taking these women out in the field to meet men at street festivals.
AMT: What advice would you give to women interested in starting a side hustle?CV: You have to be passionate about it because it's a lot of work. When you get home from your day job, you have all these other things to do for your side hustle. You have to be willing to work nights and weekends on it. If you're not passionate about it, you're going to quit. But, if you love it, like I do, you'll pour months and months of hard work into it without hesitation.
Make it not about yourself, too. There can be hard times and frustrating times. I've had a few people who are like, "That's just a dumb idea" or "That's stupid." If you're not confident about [your idea] you'll let that get to you. There are always going to be people who are threatened by other people's success. Looking past that will help you keep going.
AMT: I can't end this conversation without asking for your best piece of dating advice!CV: Turn off work mode and just be kind. When people get nervous they can be mean because they get vulnerable. That is the biggest turn off to any human being, not just men. Lead with a soft, feminine energy, and be kind to your date.