Five Things from….Brazil 3 Croatia 1

Match reports will be ten a penny for every game of the FIFA World Cup so this isn’t another one. This is about some of the things you may have missed whilst you were tucking into your Budweiser and special World Cup Big Mac (i.e the box is green and yellow).

1. Crap socks – What’s going on?  The world is watching and Nike had the opportunity to put a stake in the ground and get one over on official sponsor Adidas.  But they have failed on day one.  Two teams, two crap pairs of socks.  That’s what people want to see.  Sod the shirts, the haircuts…damn, even the ball. S O C K S.  They look like the pairs you use to find in the lost property bin at school when you’d forgotten your PE kit.  Nike – hang your head in shame.

2. Strange opening game goals - Omam-Biyik in 1990, Diana Ross in 1994, Papa Bouba Diop in 2002 and of course Scotland scoring twice v Brazil in France 1998.  Add to that list Marcelo in Brazil 2014.  I’m sure there was nothing he could do about the goal but it wasn’t exactly a world-class finish was it?  In fact, I’m sure that I could have put that one in.  In case you were interested, the odds on an own goal opening the tournament was 20/1.

3. The white spray – Simple idea, very effective.  How long before we see referees end the free-kick 10 yard line with a squiggle or even a kiss?  What happens if it snows (never rule it out according to climate experts)?  Do referees have a variety of colours for different conditions? Suppose they get it confused with shaving foam? A great idea from my daughter – “Why don’t they make all spray paint disappear.  That way people could graffiti but then a few hours later it’s all clean again?”  Clever girl, she will go far.

4. FlyFutbol – “Allin or nothing”, “Yingli Solar”, “Fly Emirates”…Hmm.  But what on earth was “FlyFutbol” all about?  No idea on that one McDonalds.  I Googled it and nothing came up – poor marketing message.  Dare I say, fragmented, as my good friend Francesco would say.  What’s wrong with Rainham Steel, CarLube and DadCheck.com?  Modern football is rubbish.

5. A nice young man – Not my words, but those of my Mum on seeing a picture of Niko Kovac on the touchline, wearing a nice smart suit, shirt and tie.  “That’s what the manager should be wearing.  He is the ambassador for his country. Look at that scruffy herbert!” She is firmly in the Luge Pravda camp of managers having to wear suits rather than shell suits.  There’s no dignity in that look at the age of 65 according to my Mum.

Score in the Beer World Cup

Brahma 1 Plan Zlatni 2

Same time tomorrow everyone?