I had to leave my sister at the bus stopAs she is going away for a few daysThen walked Honey and LeaCame homeQuick cuppaGot changedAnd set off to collect MarieWe arrived at the venueI had butterflies in my tummyI hadn't been to this meeting in yearsAnd was nervous to say the least
We went in and took our seatsI watched the people coming inSome I recognised Some I didn't I had already decided that I wasn't going to speakI just didn't have the courage or confidenceFor those of you that don't knowIt goes like thisSomeone opens the meetingAnd reads the preamble And the stepsThen someone else does 'The top table'Which means they share their story of addiction and recoveryIt's always great to listen to these speakersIt was just what I needed to hear today
One by oneEveryone spokeUntil it was just me left I was so nervousBut somehow I got the words out
My name is Ruby And I'm an addict
I haven't said those words in such a long timeBut they are so trueI am an addictA recovering addictI spoke briefly about how I had just returned to meetings after a relapseAnd that I was very grateful to have made it back in to the roomsRelatively unscathedWhen I had finished speakingThe woman next to me Reached over and took my handI was really touched
All in allThe meeting lasted two hoursWhich is unusually longBut it did the trickAs it always doesAnd reminded me why I need the roomsAnd the people in them
Tomorrow will be my first evening meetingWhich will be harder to get to I thinkAs I will have all day to deal with my crazy headAnd the argument back and forth of whether I should or shouldn't goButI'll deal with that tomorrowFor nowI'm going for another walk in the sunshineAnd enjoy the rest of my dayBelow is my calendar for keeping track of my daysA doggy one of course
2 down88 to go