Young professionals that I know often say adulting sucks. Quite a bit of the time I tend to agree with them. The 9-2-5 makes just getting along difficult, at times. I’m sure there’s software to ease some of the woes, but you have to learn how to use it. And that takes time. Time I’d rather spend writing or reading. For example, to get a small break on state taxes, if you work from home, you need to calculate your office space and then how much it costs to exist in your house for the year. When I remember to do so, I can look utilities and mortgage up in Quicken. Sometimes, however, when a book in my mind is distracting me I just tot all this up on the back of an envelope. Then I need to type it in so my accountant can see it (taxes are far too complicated for mere mortals) and, I can’t underscore this too many times: numbers are adulting.
I’m an idea person. The 9-2-5 (numbers!) that keeps you in front of a computer all week long means that things pile up. Weekends seem too short to spend on numbers. But you’ve got to balance that checkbook. And even tot up the number of hours you give to “the man” each day. What could be more adult than accounting? Don’t get me wrong—at times numbers can be interesting. Numbers, at their best, are philosophical. One squared is one. When you square any number greater than one, it increases. One doesn’t. And you can’t divide by zero and get zero for an answer, as handy as that’d be from time to time. These abstract concepts come in useful but adulting involves serious numbers. Numbers that imply liquidity. Cash flow.
Time is made up of numbers too. If a social event comes up on a weekend, there goes your grocery and cleaning time. And writing a book takes a tremendous amount of time. It’s a second job on top of the other one you work 9-2-5. All of this makes me think of those TIAA-CREF ads that showed prominent professors and captions that said “Because some people don’t have time to think of money.” Or something similar. That’s what I’m talking about. Adulting is all about money. And money must be taxed. And you have to keep track of where it all goes. I’m sure Quicken could help me with this, if I had time to learn it. (We pay for it after all.) But I’m kind of busy writing this book…