When we are younger, we deal with a lot of things in our lives without realizing that we really do not need to. We are taught to put up with things and not complain, we are taught that being young and immature, we do not really have a say in things. But the older you get, the more you start to realize that there are some things you absolutely do not need to deal with life. Here are some things that, since I am almost 20.
1. Meaningless Relationships
Maybe not everyone agrees with me on this one, but I am someone who absolutely cannot get into a relationship where I don’t see a future. I don’t see a point in it. I’m young and probably nowhere near finding “the one” yet (or maybe I am, who knows) but I know for a fact that I cannot be with someone if I already know that it is a relationship that is just temporary; I can’t put time, effort and emotions into something if I already see the end of the journey.
2. Being Told I’m Not “Mature” Yet
Listen, I know that I make a lot of stupid decisions and don’t always have the best judgment. But that no longer has anything to do with my age. As children, we are constantly told that “you’re not old enough to understand” or that “you are still immature,” but I truly think that these are statements that are no longer true once you’ve reached 18 or 19. Around that age, we start to truly understand what life is; of course, you learn something new every day, and you might not have the same wisdom as someone who has seen 30 years more of life than you, but that does not mean that you are still incapable of making smart decisions or guiding your own life once you become a young adult.
3. Social/Gender Norms
There are exceptions to this, some social norms or rules are definitely necessary and useful (like, hey, leave the waiter a tip and be polite to others, those don’t hurt). However, there are also a lot that I no longer will follow, no matter who tries to tell me that it’s absolutely necessary. I do not need to always be lady-like or spend all my time cooking and cleaning because I’m a female, there should not be a stigma attached to being promiscuous and you don’t have to be married and have a family by a certain age.
4. Judgmental People
Constructive criticism is one thing, but there are those people who are always judging you and have something negative to say about the decisions you make in life (whether they say it to your face or behind your back). This could be friends, coworkers, family or strangers; regardless, don’t let their comments get to you. As I grow older, I am starting to learn how much stress-free you become and how much better life is once you learn not to care so much about what others think.
5. Bad Friends
As children, we believe that the more friends we have, the cooler or more popular we are. However, if you look back, every year of adolescence you go through, you tend to come out with fewer friends. I considered every person my pal but now, there are very few people I am close to. Life is too short to consider every person your friend or put up with their bullshit.
Let go of the ones who are always flaky, the ones who take advantage of you or the ones who are never there for you when you need but always expect you to stick around for them. Find the people who would take a bullet for you, and for who you would do the same, and keep them close to you. Good friends are as important as family, and those few close people will be there for a lifetime.