10 Reasons Why You Can't Stop Obsessing About A GUY.
Obsessing Over A Guy Is Not Crazy or Weird. Usually, as women we are made to feel obsessive over a guy instead of just highly passionate because society tries to dig in make women look pathetic in quite obvious ways and in ways like this where even though we could be fully aware that society calls you obsessed and not obsessed if considered by definition:
When Men Are Pursuing A Woman: They are being romantic, are so cute, etc. Men also say that other men who are showing there affection towards a women are: pussy's, less than a man, a sissy, or pathetic for showing a woman they care.
When Women Are Persuing A Man: They are obsessed, being or acting like a stalker etc.
The information above is there to remind you that we start out screwed in this area of being falsey judged for showing or informing a guy about our feelings where society is concerned. Personally, I tend to ignore society when it benefits me and the way I have learned to deal with this area works better than being worried that whats his face thinks of me. P.S Your only maybe considered a stalker when someone calls the police.
1.You fucking genuinely like the guy.
2. He is an ex who hasn't done enough to mess up things. He hasnt done anything yet that you would find a deal breaker or to embarrasing if you took him back.
3. He is a mental mind game player with no winner/He needs meds and help, and you didn't know that he was in need of psychological help before you fell in love with him. Or you are about to figure out why you are not the one to fix it! P.S. There is no way to get him to see the light because he already sees it. He just pretends not to.
4. He cheated. And now ever since he cheated you are constantly paranoid when he goes out with the same friends and frequents the same places he did while his past cheating experiences took place. Your also worried about other things you probably were not as worried about until the cheating such as: strippers don't count, porn, female friends etc.
6. HE WONT ANSWER THE G** Damn PHONE..EVER!
Self exaplanatory one call back or answer takes away the reason for anyone to call fifty times.
7. HE IS In a 30 mile distance from his ex-the fear would be the knowledge of this and how it got there.
8. He is being hot and cold.
One minute he is confused the next he loves you and wants to fix it. REPEAT this line and replace the word cofused, loves and to fix it with any words that seem appliable in the next moment.
9. He dumped you and now you truly like him. You didn't like him at all and as soon as he let you go you realized that you liked him. He is now dating someone else and would rather punish you for not naturally feeling that way for him fast enough. His new girlfriend usually mirrors splinter from the ninja turtles though-thank GOD!
10. Your in a long distance relationship. See below.
STOP TRYING OR TELLING YOURSELF TO STOP. If you let yourself obsess eventually you will do it less.
CHECK YOUR PHONE EVERY SECOND IF YOU WANT TO. Putting it away in order to hope you come back to it with 5 missed calls from him either results in a enormous let down, 5 missed calls from friends who are now on the way to a party where he is and you wont have a ride!, or 5 missed calls from him but since he is a loser asshole and since you wanted to put away your phone when you call him back he doesn't answer-all five times you try.
TALK IT TO DEATH AGAIN With you friends and don't apologize many times have you had to listen to their shit-if not than you will soon enough-plus they can hang up if they don't want to talk. EXTRA TIP: if a friend is ever mean to you or rude about your hurt or hurtful feelings in a relationship tell them to fuck off and get another friend. The only time a friend should step in enough to end your friendship is if the guy your dating is crazy and wants to hurt you or her (movie again read below).
IF YOUR GONNA CAVE CALL INSTEAD OF TEXT.
IF YOU TEXT: ALL OF THESE EXAMPLES PLUS ANYTHING YOU COULD POSSIBLY TEXT
TRANSLATION FOR EXAMPLES BELOW:
Will mean this: Please stop doing this. Call me and make me stop freaking out. I want to know we are obedient. I want to know that you know you messed up. I want you to make me feel ok.
10 Reasons Why You Can't Stop Obsessing About A GUY: The REMIX VERSION for REMINDERS
2. He is an ex who hasn't done enough messed up things yet to outwardly qualify himself as a guy you would have to keep secret out of shear embarrassment for taking him back.
3. He is a mental mind game player with no winner/He needs meds and help and you didn't know that at first/and you feel you are the one who can fix it all!
4. He cheated and now when he checks the mail your paranoid. (human stuff)
3. He is a mental mind game player with no winner/He needs meds and help and you didn't know that at first/and you feel you are the one who can fix it all!
4. He cheated and now when he checks the mail your paranoid. (human stuff)
5. He is such a verbal asshole you always obsess over why he is such a jerk and try to make yourself into a repellent against the asshole disease. Or you can't figure out or haven't yet figured out he doesn't want to be happy. Why? Cause he is crazy and needs some help.
6. HE WONT ANSWER THE G** Damn PHONE..EVER!
7. HE IS In a 30 mile distance from his ex-the fear would be the knowledge of this and how it got there.
8. He is being hot and cold-He likes you, he ignores you, he kisses you, he goes on vacation, he actually never left, he talks to his ex, he wants to be with someone just like you or he just wont give you answer so you obsess for the truth.
9. He dumped you and now you genuinely like him. You didn't like him at all and as soon as he let you go you realized that you liked him. He is now dating someone else and would rather punish you for not naturally feeling that way for him fast enough. His new girlfriend usually mirrors splinter from the ninga turtles though-thank GOD!
10. Your in a long distance relationship. See below.
HOW TO STOP?
IF YOU TRY TO GET YOUR MIND OFF OF IT YOU WILL MAKE IT WORSE!
DON'T THINK POSITIVE TO MUCH-Don't sit there and lie to yourself about how you are ok with this behavior worthy, its no substantial deal, etc. First, you look stupid lying to people and trying to convince yourself at the same time. Plus, in a few hours later when mascara is all over your face your credibility is lost and it just makes the whole thing a lot messier. Either shut up, tell the truth, keep it to a minimum, or make some shit up about something else. Don't reenact any scenes which include lines or stage directions from the following plays:
"I don't need a guy and I can conquer the world tonight."
"I don't even care about that asshole anymore."
"I am so hot and can get so many guys by proving it tonight!"
YOU WILL STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM WHEN YOU STOP TELLING YOURSELF. Stop giving yourself verbal instructions! Yourself doesnt hear you!STOP TRYING OR TELLING YOURSELF TO STOP. If you let yourself obsess eventually you will do it less.
CHECK YOUR PHONE EVERY SECOND IF YOU WANT TO. JUST DON"T CHANGE YOUR NUMBER!!!Putting it away in order to hope you come back to it with 5 missed calls from him either results in a colossal let down, 5 missed calls from friends who are now on the way to a party where he is and you dont have a ride!, or 5 missed calls from him but since he is a loser asshole and since you wanted to put away your phone when you call him back he doesn't answer-all five times you try.
"did I leave my keys over there?"
"so are gonna watch the game this Sunday?"
"just letting you know your teacher is giving a pop quiz."
"there is a light out on the usual way take the other road ok?"
"I love you."
"I miss you."
"please answer!"
"fuck you!"
"Merry christmas!"
What is the prototype of this guy that women are usually known to obsess over?
LONG VERSION-
1. well if your stalker or 14 then this person would be ( in my day) Justin Timberlake from NSYNC- or today- that Justin Bieber kid.
2. After you start your period....
The X factor-or for those on round three + at dating this guy- X-Fatctor/Loser I can't stop loving/ guy.
This guy is usually an ex-boyfriend but can take the form of a, "scared to date dater," or "in a form of a dramatic man claiming to hate drama while living the life of a Maury show contestant." they can also disguise themselves as a normal guy with testosterone-only to find out later that their mother (who is usually crazy as bat shit and always ugly for no reason powerful but coincidence) as their own little decision maker. Since his mother is like I said usually crazy and not attractive chances are you're more attractive and at the moment still sane. the mother doesn't like you for any legitimate reason and knows it so chooses to make snide comments and try to fuck up shit in the relationship with your man behind your back. Even though her boyfriend was hopefully not a moron knows his mother's not even close to a better than Rusty tool in the shed; he chooses to take his mother's dislike of you as ammo to begin this confusing Candyland/Fucked Up Version of chutes and ladders game I like to call: I love you/I hate you/I kinda love you/I love my new date/I hate myself/I just want you to put up with this shit/Circle of Hell.
Sigh would offer little tangent there that exes as her exes for a reason. So anyway here the 10 reasons why you can't stop thinking about this loser.
1). YOU FELL FOR HIM-you fell for this guy and now you're screwed. In the beginning you either didn't care as much, or maybe even like him that much but as soon as your feelings started to ignite he pulled out that rug from underneath you, and without even trying to help you up symbolically said, "Surprise bitch I am a completed different person, and I am crazy!" I truly don't know if it's because were women and typically the universe, or whoever's in charge of the whole gender/who must put up with more bs arena-women don't exactly get an easy ride. But anyway a butterfly feeling similar to a 24-hour a day ecstasy high on steroids-has already trapped you for a solid six months at least until either this guy who tricked you (the wolf in sheeps clothing) either fucks you over so bad it becomes too embarrassing to even try and avoid or lie for what this guy does in front of your friends or family. For example: since I was speaking about the wolf wearing sheep's clothing it would be pretty easy to let this guy go if he cheated on you with a sheep get it?
2). He's an asshole and sent you on a 24-hour quest to figure out why he's an asshole.
This guy usually calls every three days or tends to show up or pop up in your life at a point you honestly didn't care as much for the moment. The point of him coming back was to make sure you didn't go get happy without him-God for bid!
OR... This guy is someone you've just started dating or been dating consistently and then just all the sudden kind of played the I'm in a drop off the face of the earth temporarily-or until you get the balls to contact this guy-and saying the right thing in terms of figuring out what the fuck you was or why hasn't called in a beautifully orchestrated way with society standards so you don't look like a fucking moron.
3). YOU WERE REALLY SURE HE'D CALL-In your drunk state you were sure he would call which has wrongly transitioned to your sober state. But lets say you had a terrific time with the guy a few times with the guy and were super surprised when he disappeared off the planet-this is different than the ex-disappearing up the planet for three days or a week-I mean not calling all and you know deep down that is not going to again. You don't even have time or you didn't even have time to fall for him fully yet-you're processing with the unknown-which is normal.
4). Because every single time it hits 2 AM and your drunk and there's no one else around (especially the guy you genuinely like ie: your loser ex or "friend with benefits," or whoever) you always call that one guy who usually shows up. Now if he starts dodging your calls then you might actually start obsessing because how dare his ugly ass not answer the phone when you got drunk enough to call him!
5). HE CHEATS. He cheats in either your human and not over it or he hasn't done shed about trying to make you feel better about the situation. You guys, "working on it," hasn't started yet because nobody's come up with a outline, or plan. Even if you're going to go work on your face stuffed the planet a date to go to the plastic surgeon's office, and relationships are a lot harder to work out the deviated septum.
You freak out and call him all the time or way from the point of time because he cheated on you and you don't trust him, he still goes to places or frequently hangs out with people he used to while cheating, he's cheating and deep down you know it, or because you know he's cheating and you haven't caught him yet.
6.) SAFE AT THE STRIP CLUB?- He is out late and won't answer the fucking phone-people go out late at night in a social setting for small number of reasons 1: to get drunk with people they know 2: to get drunk with people they don't know 3: to get drunk with people who won't care if you cheat rack like a complete moron 4: to have a guys night which is actually a night in which males get together in a group and by the end of the night 90% of the men in the group tried to get laid, 95% try to get laid or get it should make it more than once, 98% decided to just go to the strip club because it takes less work to get the chick naked and there's always a plus if you have a girlfriend because someone a long time ago decided that naked members of the opposite sex dancing and grinding in front of a person who is sexually interested in them ( your boyfriend or husband) while he is probably physically aroused and wishing with with all his might when he has sex with you close this skank will pop up) that it doesn't count as cheating. Just because your man is going to spend time alone in the restroom or on top of you wishing and pretending or closing his eyes and picturing a stripper who he in real life has seen naked-What base is that? Three? --Anyway-98 percent of the strip club attendees of the group during boys night know that seeing and having this hot naked chick grind on them for three hours would give him and a lot less trouble with his girlfriend if he went to a party where he knew his ex might show up! or even worse ask some check for a picture of her naked! That would be a problem with your girlfriend! so to avoid the drama, see more skin, whilst enjoying a cold beverage-strip clubs are the way to go for many. Now if you consider naked women touching your man cheating even if she is being paid and doesn't want your man back in the same way (who cares? Your boyfriend doesn't care either how she genuinely feels because bouncing ass and titties says different) than what are you so upset about?
To add-there's nothing wrong with going to strip clubs whether you're single or married, in a relationship, going for fun, going with your partner, going alone etc. there is only a problem with going to strip clubs if your partner uses his cheating or if you don't have sex with your partner and decide to get off from strip clubs instead. Also even if your girlfriend a partner school you going to strip clubs after you have already cheated on her-if you go your an asshole. You're not even an ass hole because you're risking cheating again ( your enough you're going to again or not) your an asshole because even you now won't respect her as much or even more because you even know how fucking ridiculous she is allowing you to act. 7.) BECAUSE HE IS ALWAYS BUSY-OR ONLY BUSY WHEN HE IS DOING SOMETHING WRONG OR JUST DOESN'T WANT TO ANSWER THE PHONE!
This could be his immature form of punishment or adult timeout-for some unknown thing you did. Your relentless worrying and wondering about the whereabouts of your man is the punishment and the crime is.... Usually nothing except you getting closer to him lately which entitles you to feel some security-in other words he still wants to be in control (control of what you ask? he doesn't even know) and since you don't do anything wrong or want drama you would never guess this phone version of musical chairs has a psychological and underlying purpose. It does. He will answer as soon as you make yourself "not think about it" and decide to go out with friends. He will call and instead of wanting to end the game will make a move to round to and somehow keep up the punishment by using your plans with friends as an excuse for him to be mad.
8.) BECAUSE HE IS LIVING FAR AWAY-THEY DON"T WORK FOR LONG BECAUSE WERE HUMAN AND WE ARE NOT BUILT TO GET IT-ONE PERSON CAN FIND A WAY TO END THE DISTANCE 99.9 percent of the time. the only instances where both parties were so in love and couldn't live together or be around each other geographically no matter what-is either in a plot of some movie similarity based on an Independence Day/save the world/somebody's going to die kind of movie, or it doesn't count because it's temporary for example fighting for our country in another country isn't made to be a situation in which both members of the couple won't be physically or geographically together forever just until a certain time, if the persons in a coma than that would make sense but even then you beef geographically together because you be visiting him or her frequently in the hospital-and let's be honest if your Long distance relationship and you can't even go see the person or visit them and the hospital and you don't even like the person anyway and probably need to change her medication, cause your real fucking warped if you are leading this thing on. In a long-distance relationship there's most likely always going to be a point in time where both of the members of the partnership or one feel some sort paranoia about how the other one feels, if they're genuine, if they're cheating etc. you can say you fully trust someone and tell yourself you mean it just enough to almost believe it but the problem isn't within the trust arena. The reason long-distance relationships usually fail is because the paranoia you feel about the other partner is understood by yourself.
Only Excuses for Long TERM-Long DISTANCE Relationship
Movie types-natural disaster,
Will Smith and Aliens,
Time Travel,
COMA-Even though that doesn't truly count geographically, and
TEMPORARY circumstances that will lead to the end of the long term situation.
Being in jail (again not actually considered long distance because if the jail is that far away and she doesn't visit than she is already with someone else anyway.
You can't leave the state for legal reasons and your partner can't either for the same legal reasons (this is bordering on pathetic movie story line though that doesn't happen).
Astronaut
Never-mind your not even up there long enough to consider it long distance plus you know there every moments whereabouts-or should-see I am even to movie conscious!
BACK TO CAVE TIMES MOMENTARY THOUGHT...
As a human you understand the need to be around someone to have a relationship with them. Even if there's no cheating involved on both ends and our technology game has become more expansive-having a two-year relationship or more with the person and only seen him twice a year minus Skype, text, and email should make an immediate turn for more contact or a one-way plane ticket soon before you're on Oprah talking about a guy who had a quadruple life-and you are the moron who got tricked and didn't know because you were stupid enough to get a long-distance relationship. Starting with caveman times the mom caveman in the deck caveman and all the little caveman kids stayed together in the same cave. And even when the caveman cave woman was slowly getting to know each other once they had adapted to spending a lot of time together usually would find it odd or worrisome if there cave partner was hiding from them or disappearing.
Obsessing Over A Guy Is Not Crazy or Weird. Usually, as women we are made to feel obsessive over a guy instead of just highly passionate because society tries to dig in make women look pathetic in quiet obvious ways and in ways like this where even though we could be fully aware that society calls you obsessed and not obsessed if considered by definition: You still can't justify it enough to yourself because everyone else has a conformed set of understanding about men who are overtly interested or eager to talk-"Romantic, Sweet, Cute, Funny." When women are being, "Crazy, Stalking Someone if they call more than 5 times, Weak, or like we coin in this long article; Obsessed.
Here are 10 reasons why you can't stop thinking about a guy...the short version, than the real version extended, plus some easy tips to try and keep yourself sane while obsessing about this guy.
5. He is such a verbal asshole you always obsess over why he is such a jerk and try to make yourself into a repellent against the asshole disease. Or you can't figure out or haven't yet figured out he doesn't want to be happy. Why? Cause he is crazy and needs some help.
HOW TO STOP?
-So as long as your not in anyone's bushes (long) hiding than you actually shouldn't freak out so much about how you obsess. Usually there is 89% chance your obsessing due to this guy's nature: he is a loser or an asshole and that butterfly/love/worried he will get with someone hotter feeling is still quite high on the meter.
1. You fell for him and literally are consumed with that love drug..I am serious
TRYING to get your mind off it by doing a bunch of shit you never want to do even when your not hurting is a no-no. Going out with your friends is acceptable. But don't use this night out as an exuse to get drunk and tell everyone who will listen your story. Also, leave that guy who you don't think is cute alone.