I’m on vacation right now. It’s been a crappy year for all of us so, we grabbed some friends and headed to the most touristy beach in South Carolina. Yep, Myrtle Beach. We make this pilgrimage every year and every year we find the best people watching, dive bar drink specials, fresh seafood and lots of relaxation under the resort umbrellas. Oh, and the occasional alligator sighting on the beach. (Yes, alligators live at the beach too).
While there are so many things to do here, we are planning a dinner cruise one evening. Nothing says relaxation like a riverboat dinner cruise with food and “drinks”. There is always putt-putt, golf courses, strip clubs, (not us though) expensive seafood buffets, tattoo places (this could be fun), and so much more. But we choose to mostly relax and enjoy the waves and talk about the interesting people we see on the beach. We also avoid sharks if possible. They are out there in big groups and close to the beach. Once in a while you might feel one touch you as you stand in the knee-deep water. When that happens to me (even if it’s a small fish) you will see this fat girl run to the shore so fast! Even the lifeguards are like, Damn girl!
Shopping is a must. There are outlets with lots of bargains. Cheapy beach stores that sell hermit crabs that will die and stink up your car if you forget about them when you get home and get unpacked. Or so I’m told. And you must visit the Grand Strand while you are in Myrtle. It used to be a place to go dancing and cruise the strip for hours when I was young. Even my parents when they were young did it. Now it’s like a great place to watch out for crazy people and the occasional shootings. We saw a guy try to set a hotel on fire a few years ago.
Can you just imagine sitting on the beach, sand in between your toes and an ice-cold frozen margarita in your hand? Slight breeze, no bugs and the sound of the ocean lapping at the shore. Until some kid runs by you and kicks up a pound of sand into your drink? Remember, it’s just a child and you will not look good in prison orange. Same thing for when you and your besties go out for drinks and good music. Barfights are so 1990’s. Don’t drink so much you feel the need to slap all the stupid people in the bar. We are older now and much more dignified. Right?
Remember, matching tattoos can be a great way to help you remember the great vacation of 2022. Or not. lol Stay away from sharks and bar fights. Relax and make friends with the bartender or cabana boy. I’ll try to post pictures on my Instagram account this week. Let’s all take a deep breath and enjoy a fun vacation at some point this summer. Would love to hear about your vacations and pictures!
Peace, Love and Margaritas Y’all!
Here’s a short vid of things I won’t be doing on Vaca: