My client was really upset. Her husband spent the morning watching Nascar on TV instead of cleaning the yard as promised. She could feel her frustration become more intense with the sound of each lap the cars made around the track. By the time she talked to me on Monday, she was ready to vent.
I listened to her story about how terrible her husband was and how he was to blame. I think she was a little surprised by what happened next. When I suggested that she was the source of her own discomfort, she stopped short.
People do things we don’t like and sometimes those things impact our lives in negative ways, but we always have a choice in how we process them. What my client’s husband chose to do that morning was about him, but, my client’s reaction was all her own. She could have handled the situation without feeling like a victim or suffering.
Relationships are complicated and we are all human, but we do have choices. The next time you feel yourself getting upset, stop and ask yourself if there might be a better way to respond to the situation. Remind yourself that letting yourself get worked is a waste of your precious time on this earth and will only hurt you.
And then, make a self-honoring choice …