What Am I Doing?

By Winyeemichelle

On trying to work out our path and keeping up with ambition. By Michelle Chai.
Bloggers; we're an ambitious bunch, it has to be said.
With social media platforms being an other-wordly treasure trove to share achievements, milestones and more, it's easy to feel lost and to feel like you're losing traction. This year - this week in fact - marks 2 years since I moved home. For reference and visibility, I'm 23 and living in my parents'/the family home. And I love it.
I couldn't count on two hands the amount of times I've divulged this information with someone and been met with 'What?! Aren't you a bit old for that?'. Well, no, I'm not. The taboo that exists around this is pretty mystifying yet not at all. While I'm lucky enough that my parents don't charge me rent, I clean, cook, pay bills and food shop at home. I don't wait for my parents to come home and make my dinner. (In fact, they work from 10am-1am, 7 days a week, so now try and tell me I'm incapable of living on my own.) Yet when I'm questioned for my livin' situ, the question what am I doing? crosses my mind again. Well, I'm saving to independently buy my own house, run my own business and to be able to freely travel. All dem ambitions.
The same question derives from ye olde career chat. I hate this part. I often have this internal struggle -- so I have a degree. It means next to nothing when realms of experience and talent are involved, and even more so pure ambition. The last couple of weeks have been scattered with coffee, dinners and catch-ups with new and old friends, each of them in varying states of happiness towards their jobs. And somehow whenever it gets to 'my turn' and I'm all, "I probably not going to do this forever," they question why I'm questioning myself. So, what am I doing? I don't know, but who does? Working it out (ironically, ha) is part of the fun.
Finally, with the blogosphere catapulting into levels and places we never imagined - have you spotted Jim Chapman on ITV2 yet?! I'm a proud fangirl - it's all too easy to second-guess ourselves. No matter how many blogs are begun or might sadly stop it's kind to remember that we're all here because, at heart, blogging combines words, our favorite clothes/products/food/lifestyle enhancements and it means we all get to have a chinwag, non? So, what am I doing? Well... I'm sitting at my MacBook for nigh on 4 hours an evening, dedicating plenty of time to my favorite hobby. I'm learning tips from Lyzi on how to enjoy the little things, wishing myself a better photographer and more honest person from Gem, coveting Anna's beauty wit, being in wonderment at Erin's savvy DIY skillz and getting ready to somehow steal Rumi's wardrobe.
What am I doing? It doesn't matter. It's all about the little things -- it'll work out in the end. Just you wait.
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Do you often worry about The Future and what your long term plans are? Share them in the comments for a future article! Or better yet, shoot me an email and we can chat (: