Very Funny Post from a Dad Blog I Subscribe to

I subscribe to many dad blogs and one of these blogs, Single Dad Laughing, made one hilarious post that I’d like to share here.
On his Facebook page he posted this question:  “What is something you’ve found yourself saying to a child that you never thought you would?”
The answers he got back were incredibly funny.  Here are some of my favorites:

• I won’t always be able to hold your hand while you poop.
• Your bum probably hurts because you ate too much chocolate.
• Do not play tug of war with the dog using your teeth.
• Take the turtle out of your underwear! NOW!
• You’re gonna have to wear something besides gloves and shoes.
• Your pee-pee does not need glitter.
• Sweetie, ‘Alcohol’ isn’t the best name for your new bear…
• All right. Who wrapped the dog in duct tape?
• Why are there butt marks on my scanner?

I’m afraid I don’t have anything to contribute here.  Maybe you do?  Check out his post here (there's many more than what I posted above), which links to his other posts on the same subject, since there’s way too much hilarity for just one post.