What to say today...
My first born turned six yesterday. Currently, so much happiness is running through me that I feel suspended slightly above myself, images of laboring, birthing, feeling him in my arms held next to my heart for the first time. And each year since. The ups and downs. The moments when I'm just sure I'm failing, and then he wraps his arms around me and says something so supremely positive that I'm left forgiving myself. Together we breathe in each moment. My children remind me. Isn't that amazing? Isn't that amazing, I now say to myself at night, along with Thank You.
Right now I am emotional. My little ones are growing so fast and as much as I appreciate their magical little selves, I feel like time is slipping by, and it is the slippery mixing of my own parents aging, my dad - now gone, my sisters and brother, my family made mine by marriage, and the deep love I feel for all of them. The bees knees.
What to say...
I keep them all as close to me as I possibly can. My own children I hold daily and inhale the scent of their hair, their skin. I run my fingertips over their freckles and the folds of their necks. I smother them with kisses and hug them an unforgettable amount. Oh, they will always know the feel of my hugs, that I know for sure.
Last night I held Theo in my arms and thanked him for being here. He laughed and leaned into me, "Sure, Mom", he said.
Theodore; Greek; A divine gift from god.
Indeed.