Engagement season is still in full swing and if your Facebook feed has been exploding with sparkly new baubles, just rest assured knowing that celebs’ are doing the same. We’ve seen a slew of recent celebrity engagements (They’re just like us! With bigger diamonds!) and for the most part, I’m usually all happy about it. Robin Right? Yay! Jamie Chung? ZOMG did you see her halo engagement ring? But there are some couples that have me going “What?” “Why?” and most certainly “Who?” Sometimes I’m genuinely concerned for their sweet cherubic hearts (see below). Other times I’m concerned for their fiancee’s (Miley). And sometimes I just. don’t. get. it. Regardless of my misgivings, it’s most important to me that we all remember what’s at stake here: really gorgeous and expensive engagement rings. And I just don’t want to see these rings get hurt, or end up thrown off Santa Monica pier (these celebs are crazy). At the very least I want to ensure that every ring headed for a Kardashianesque fate finds a safe haven – preferably the RLJ showcase after my boss makes them an offer they can’t refuse. Although if the ex gets to keep the ring he “allegedly” bought and then sell it in a highly public and buzzed about auction, well that’s a good consolation prize.
Ashley Simpson & Evan Ross
Ashlee Simpson is in ello ello ello L-O-V-E and she doesn’t care who knows it! Ryan Cabrera’s former muse tweeted a picture of her engaged to Diana Ross’s son Evan. Evan proposed in Hawaii with a gorgeous vintage inspired ring. Ashley holds the marquise shaped sparkler, that looks like it’s platinum with gemstone or black diamond accents, next to her new fiance and Lindsey Lohan’s old lips. I once used iron-on letters to make an Ashlee Simpson lyrics t-shirt to demonstrate my edginess. I was so edgy, in fact, that I also crowd surfed at a Fall Out Boy concert and landed at the feet of one Pete Wentz, thus allowing me to doodle “Me and Peeeeeete” over and over in my notebook. And (we’re coming full circle now) I’m upset that Ashlee beat Pete to re-engagement because have you seen his girlfriend? Anyways, I hope that Ashlee is very happy with her very pretty ring and I super duper hope that she always tries to initiate family caroling at Christmas because can you please just imagine the look on Diana Ross’s face?
Emma Roberts & Evan Peters
via Glamour
Full disclosure, I was never on Team Tate but I am all about Madison Montgomery. I’m fairly certain Emma Roberts isn’t actually acting and that’s why I love the character so much (no spoilers please I’m embarrassingly far behind on Coven). But these two crazy kids seemed sweet together, until I found out that they actually might be crazy. Maybe Emma’s domestic violence for beating up Evan really was just a whole big misunderstanding, and maybe this really is a love story for the ages. But you can’t blame me for being skeptical, I just want to make sure her gorgeous new ring is going to a happy home. The ring is a beautiful round brilliant set into a rose gold micropave halo setting on an impossibly delicate rose gold band. It is breathtaking, not tacky, and totally age appropriate in style – if not in size. But this is Hollywood, so every 22 year old gets a B.A.D. for their first proposal.
Kaley Cuoco & I Refuse to Google
via Glamour
Yes, I know they’ve already been engaged for like soo long (3 months) and I’m way late to the game because they’re actually married now, but let’s just pause. Does she expect us to forget the shameful attempt at making everyone believe she was dating Superman earlier this year? Or that Superman bolted after it was a glaringly obvious fake relationship and is now adopting adorable puppies with his real girlfriend? Or that two other bigger celebrities wore pink wedding dresses and they did it better than she did? We remember. I remember. And no amount of upside-down wedding cake will make me forget. But maybe having your baker put in an extra two weeks of work on your wedding cake is the secret to a happy union and the couple of 6 months will make it for the long haul. I’m dubious, and I wish her beautiful engagement ring and both of her wedding rings (extra insurance for the vows?) the best of luck on their journey.