My paternal gran was the archetypal grannie, complete with white hair and little round glasses. She lived very near us and we saw a lot of her.
Like most grans, she came out with some strange things from time to time. Some of her sayings were:
"Having your guts for garters". I know. Awful really. She'd say this if she was warning us of how much trouble we'd get into for something. "Your mother will have your guts for garters".
"Your granddad would turn in his grave". I didn't really know this granddad but by all accounts he was a lovely man. Not quite sure why he would have been so put out or annoyed by half the things she was referring to when she said this. And besides, I do believe he was cremated.
"All that money on your education". Although I was generally thought of as quite a clever little lass, (who apparently plateau'd at about age 12), I could do some fairly thick things from time to time. She never failed to remind me either.
"We are sailing", (hands in the air, singing softly.) She'd do this whenever she had more than one sherry, which was usually at Christmas. Dad would take her to his club and of course, his friends would make a big fuss of her (ie. buy her drinks). She'd come back in the door, pink in the cheeks, not knowing any of the words other than the first three.
Bless.